Around MY World in Eighty Days - Charles Fornau

Chapter One - The End

When she left me, I was utterly stunned. There was no warning. At least there was no indication that I saw, and nothing bad happening that I was aware of. Literally, I was left with no thoughts, no movement, intense and abject depression, and absolutely no will to go on. My world, at that point, I was sure, had ended. It happened the day before my forty-third birthday. If it had to happen, thank God that was when she chose to cave my world in, and turn my entire life inside out and upside down.

I didn’t handle it well. I tried to contact Kim to ask her why. To ask what had happened. What had I done that was so egregious that she had to just up and abandon our relationship, our lives, our future? We’d been together for three years and engaged for almost one of those. Our wedding date had been set for a scant three months from that day. April was her month, May was mine, and August was supposed to have been ours.

She wouldn’t return my calls, texts, or emails. I had a drink or two between each attempt, and finally, around midnight, I gave up. A bit in the wind, at least three sheets, I sat down in my favorite recliner, a gift from her, phone in hand, and cried myself to sleep.

Ronnie called the next morning, as he had for the last fifteen years since we were stationed together. He never missed my birthday. I missed his, just six days later, seventy-five percent of the time. He was truly, and I’ll be the first to say it, a better friend than I would ever be. At least a more thoughtful friend. But thankfully he was that better friend I needed on that specific birthday.

The phone hurt my head. It hurt my ears. I think it hurt my hair. I answered, went through some niceties, then when he told me I sounded a bit down, I spilled my guts.

“Jesus Christ, Charlie! What did she catch you doing?” Hopefully he was trying to make me smile and break me out of my funk. I was pretty sure he knew me better than to think I would have sabotaged my own relationship, anyway.

“Not a thing, asshole. I didn’t even see it coming. I still don’t know what exactly happened. She didn’t say much except ‘Goodbye’ and that she’d send for her things. Please don’t tell me you think I would have done something to cause her to leave. You know me better than that.”

“Yeah, you’re right, I do know you better than that. You put up with a lot, I know that. If Debbie treated me the way I heard Kim treating you, I would have been the one to leave, and we’re married. You have any vacation time coming?”

“All I want. The plant closed and all the equipment is headed to Chicago. You know how I feel about that place.”

“Come visit. Just drop everything and get your ass out here. I’ll break open a jug of Dickel and we’ll talk.”

“Give me a few days. I’m going to put all my stuff in storage and notify the landlord. She can clear the place out and…” I lost it a bit, and Ronnie picked up on it.

“I know, buddy. It’s tough being in that situation. All of a sudden alone. Been there, done that. So have you, though. We’ve both talked about it. There’s another Kim out there, Charlie. A better one. One that won’t leave you hanging. Maybe even one that won’t leave you. You’ll see. Keep in mind you’re not alone, too. You aren’t. We’ll always be here. You can count on that. Get your stuff together and come see us. I’ll make you some of my ribs.”

“I’ll take you up on your offer, old friend. I just need to make sure my stuff is safe, and I’ll be there. Thanks, Ronnie. Tell Debbie I said ‘Hi’. I’ll see y’all in a few days.”

We closed and I called a moving company and my favorite gun shop. The movers would be there the next morning and the gun shop was waiting for me to bring my collection to them for safe storage. I had way too much wrapped up in my guns to let someone come in and take them, or the safe they were in. Being in an apartment, on the second floor, no less, I couldn’t anchor the behemoth to the floor beneath it. Oh, well, I’d take a couple of my favorite carry pistols with me and leave the rest with Jack. None of them were antiques or anything, they just meant a lot to me. Copies of, or weapons similar to, those that I’d used in my prior life, and I just loved the way they felt in my hands.

I walked in, Jack greeting me in his usual fashion. “S’up, Colonel?”

“Jack, I’d tell you, but I’d hate for you to get caught crying in front of me. Marines don’t do that, normally, but if I told you about my day yesterday, you surely would.”

“Please tell me she didn’t…”

“She did, Corporal. She did. Gone. No explanation. I’m bailing and need you to look after my babies.”

“Bring ‘em in, Charlie. You know better than to even think you need to ask.”

I went out and got them out of the back of the truck and laid three cases on the counter. My .25-06 hunting rifle, my AR-15, which was just a street legal M4 GAU wannabe, a Centennial Edition Winchester ’94 Ranger, a Model 27 with Combat Masterpiece grips, then the ancient worthless old M-1, a seven millimeter Mauser whose only claim to fame was that it shot straight, every damned time, the little Marlin .22 semi auto, and a few pistols and revolvers I used for carry and practice in various and sundry calibers. All in all, there were fifteen of them.

As I removed each of them from the satchels and cases, checked to make sure they were unloaded, and was handing them to him, I explained the situation. I knew I’d be back. I just didn’t know when. “Jack, can you have them cleaned up good and prepped for storage? My life is just about unknown right now.”

“I’ll take care of them, Charlie. Don’t doubt that. We actually have a new oil just for that purpose and we can use you for a guinea pig.” He started laughing. “It’s good stuff, we just never had any before.”

“Thanks. Can you hand me a box of those Federal 45s right there, and some of the 165 grain 40s? Same kind.” He handed them to me. “Thanks. Here’s three hundred. That should cover the ammo and six months storage or so. And some of that new oil you’re so proud of.”

“After all the business you’ve given us, you know I wouldn’t charge you for keeping them.”

“I figured as much but take it. If anyone asks… Anyone but our uncle… You don’t have them. One of those, the Smith CT wheel gun, she thought was hers. I’d rather she didn’t have it. I bought it, if you remember correctly.”

“I do, Charlie, and I haven’t seen it since. That’s my story and I’m gonna stick with it. You be careful out there. Can I ask where you’re headed?”

“North Carolina first, then Houston, Tucson, San Diego, Sunnyvale, Eugene or Portland, depending, then Spokane, Rapid City, and…. Hell, I don’t know. I’ll be back, though.” He took my hand and pulled me over the counter, a pile of firearms underneath us, into a hug. “If I asked you to keep my truck, Jack, what would you say?”

“That pile of shit? What the hell would I even do with it?” He started laughing and nodded.

“Asshole. Here’s a key. Go over to this address and take it home on Sunday. I’ll be long gone. Drive it once in a while. Registration and insurance cards are in the console. I WILL be back, so don’t sell it.” I handed him the key fob for my 2018 F-150 Lariat, then we shook again, and I walked out. Piece of shit, indeed. He drove an 80s Chevy Silverado with camouflage seat covers and the always present rusted out cab corners and wheel wells. ‘Some day, Jack. Some day!’ I thought to myself, laughing on the way back out to the truck.

I met Jack there when I retired from the Air Force and came home. He’d opened the gun shop, and I was looking for a good heavy duty carry pistol. He worked me through a bunch of them, but one of the Kimber Ultras, a CDP II, made the cut. It felt really good, and even better with the Hogue wrap around rubber grips. It was my go-to piece for out-of-town travels. In town, I usually just wore my little Taurus .22 magnum wheel gun, or my little LCP. It just depended on what season it was, and what I was wearing at the time. Of course, the LCP was set up for Zombie hunting with the little green laser mounted on the side of it. Everyone had to have a firearm capable of taking out Zombies. It was just common sense!

The movers made it painless for me. They packed all the belongings I wouldn’t need for my trip, including the gun safe, beds and sofa, in a big plastic crate right there on the truck, sealed it, and left me standing there in awe. My entire life, with the exception of a few pistols, t-shirts, socks, boxers, a pair of jeans, a little shaving kit, and a jacket, fit in a big box and was on the way down the street. Oh, and one dress shirt, neatly rolled up so it would look decent if I needed it at Ronnie’s. They liked to go out for dinner quite a bit, so I needed to be prepared.

Ronnie and Debbie lived in western North Carolina. Hill country, yes, but very civilized, and a really pretty area of the country. It would be considered by most to be a suburb of, if not actually in, the Smoky Mountains. Just a really nice place to visit. They think it’s a really nice place to live. They didn’t have kids of their own, but any kid I ever saw around there was smiling. It must be a really nice place to grow up.

I headed off to the motel just outside of town and checked with the apartment cleaners to make sure they’d be there tomorrow. I wanted the place spotless and able to present it to the landlord that way. I let him know that was the plan.

He said he’d call Kim and tell her what was transpiring and warn her that her name was on the rental as a roommate, so she needed to make sure it was in the same condition when she was done clearing her things out. He said he’d give me back my security deposit after the cleaners were done, telling me he could take it out on her, legally, if she screwed the pooch. There was a paragraph in the amended lease contract about this very situation.

He was a lot better guy than I gave him credit for in what few meetings we’d had. Good tenants rarely meet the landlord. It’s the… Never mind… That’s just one of life’s obvious truths.

Another fitful night of mostly sleeplessness after a big burger, an order of broccoli, and too many margaritas at Applebee’s across the street from the motel, had me waking in a funk, yet again. I hoped Ronnie was right. My life, my attitude, and my outlook all need to get better. They can’t get much worse.

The cleaners did their thing and the apartment was spotless when they were done. Mr. Willis saw and approved of the results then handed me a check for seven hundred and fifty dollars, the security deposit. The rent was paid up until the end of the month, two and a half weeks into the future, and we were both satisfied with that.

“Mr. Adams…” I was going to correct him and tell him to just call me Charlie, but what the hell. I may never see this guy again. I just let it go. “I reached your… I reached Miss Thatcher last night. She knows the score and has agreed to it. Her people will be here Monday. She was a bit upset about the directive nature in which I spoke to her, but I mentioned the addendum and she quieted down. Can I make an observation?”

“Sure, sir. No need to pull punches now.”

“I’d rather be you than your replacement. Miss Thatcher is not the nicest person I’ve ever met, Mr. Adams. How you and she ever became a couple, I will never know, but I’m happy for you. Happy for you now. Don’t take that wrong. I know you hurt. I’ve been through it, too. It’s been a while, but I have been. It sucks. Anyway, there is life after love, whatever form it took. Take care of yourself and don’t look back. There is someone out there for you. Someone you deserve. Thank you for your service as well, Mr. Adams.”

“Trust me, sir, it was my pleasure.”

We shook hands and as I was mounting my bike, he yelled out, “Keep both of them big round rubber things on the road, young man.” He held his hand, two fingers of the peace sign pointed down and out in a biker greeting. “Be safe,” he yelled. Wow! Who’d a thunk. The guy was probably a biker. I smiled and nodded. I could just imagine a big orange bagger in his garage.

My next stop was at the bank. I deposited the check and let the teller know I’d be traveling. She entered some notes in her computer and warned me to make sure to call in if anything happened to my card. “I’ve added a note that you are traveling, Mr. Adams. It won’t look like someone stole your card and went crazy running around the country with it. Have a safe trip, sir.”

“Thank you, Beverly. We’ll see you later.” Beverly was a cute redhead I saw in the bank quite a bit. She might have been a little young for me, but I have this thing for redheads, and she was definitely what would have to be considered at the top of the game. Long red hair, long legs, always dressed professionally in skirts and heels, a touch busty, but I wouldn’t hold that against her, unless she wanted… I am so terrible. Three days ago I was considering jumping off a bridge, and now I’m fantasizing about holding a bank teller in my arms with her breasts pushing up against… There I go again.

One more night, dinner at Applebee’s, just two margaritas this time, an evening with Laura Ingraham and Shannon Bream, then somehow, I fell asleep while Tucker Carlson was talking about some new findings in some politician’s schemer deal to throw the election. It was enough to make me vomit. How the country got so vitriolic in my lifetime is beyond me. My father, God rest his soul, told me stories about Tip O’Neill, one of Nancy Pelosi’s predecessors, and President Ronald Reagan having dinner together and trying to work things out, most of the time successfully. If Pelosi and the president did that now, I’m sure a steak knife would be brandished.

My father worked at many things, but he told me his proudest moment was being chosen to be on President Reagan’s personal protective detail. That would be something, that’s for certain.

The motel I was at had a pretty nice breakfast spread, so I filled my belly while I watched a couple of really cute teenaged girls running around the dining room in their pajamas. I smiled at them when they looked my way and got some smiles back. Teases is what they were. Pretty, and they knew it. They couldn’t have been seventeen yet. One was a redhead. My undoing.

DING! It hit me, just then, like a ton of bricks. Maybe more of a CRASH! than a ding. Kim was blonde. I had a predilection for redheads, in almost every case, yet I had spent all that time, three years, with a blonde. What the hell? Is that why it didn’t work out? Were the cupids, Eos, Venus, and Aphrodite making sure my future was corrected? I saw a gorgeous girl in a ‘Red Hair Don’t Care’ t-shirt once and almost dropped to my knees and asked her to be the mother of my children. I was with Kim at the time. She was miffed that I took that third look and not impressed at all. The red headed wonder looked as good from the back as she did from the front. I tried not to be obvious, but it was hard. Women can sense these things.

It is amazing what musings might run through a person’s mind at seventy miles an hour on the open road. The throaty rumbles of my Rinehart pipes as I tooled down the road were keeping me company. They were letting my mind wander aimlessly at times, sure, but at other times I thought about important things as well. I don’t remember ever thinking about finding a job, though. Hmmm.

I was on my pride and joy. I loved my little Sportster, and that’s just what it was. I didn’t want a big bike. I didn’t need a big bike. Kim damn sure wouldn’t get on it, and I didn’t need her on it. My little Silver Bullet was just an old oh nine eight-eighty-three Iron, denim silver, but I loved her. I had her geared with new pulleys, thirty-one teeth in front and sixty-six in back, and she’d keep up with most of the road bikes without winding out now. Plus, she was still a lot quicker than the big Harleys. A lot quicker, even with the taller gears.

I didn’t push it and took two days to make it to Ronnie’s house. There was no need to hurry. I had no deadline and I wanted to look around on the way. I almost got off and went around Kentucky Lake, but decided on doing that later. That area looks like it might be a nice place to chill. I figured I could check it out on the way back through to Houston.

I’d decided early on, probably while talking to Ronnie, between my emotional breakdowns, to make this a long trip. I had even decided to send a box to each of my next destinations with a few clothes and such as I traveled. A leapfrog of my wardrobe, if you will. I had no use for flip flops on the road, for example, and had no plans of swimming or any such thing. My bags were small. Really small, Willie and Max Black Jack Compacts, and it was all I could do to haul what I had. I was fortunate that my jacket, rolled up tight, fit in my fork mounted tool bag. I think I mentioned it was a small bike.

I’d checked with each person I was visiting and got their expressed approval and heard that what I was doing was the right thing. Melissa even said it was brilliant. That’s saying something. Melissa was a genius. Her wife was a hairdresser, or stylist, or whatever they’re called, but she was a mechanical engineer working for a space vehicle contractor. The joke always was, ‘I think that meant she built satellites, but she once said if she told me she’d have to kill me and all that’. She was also extremely funny. We’d worked together, so in all actuality, I knew exactly what she did for a living.

That was San Diego and would be stop number three. I had two stops to make before I saw Melissa and Tracy.

Ronnie, thankfully, was happy to see me when I got to his place. I’d been there before, a couple of times, and it’s pretty easy to find, with GPS, on the third try. He must’ve heard the pipes, ‘cause he met me in the yard. He was out there trying to calm a bunch of weenie dogs down. He had some really cute pups. None was more than half a dog high, even though a couple of them looked like they were about two dogs long. He told me they used to hunt badgers with those things back in the day. Interesting.

We sat on the porch with a couple of shots of Dickel, his favorite, and a cold beer for me to chase mine with. He used ice water. It’s pretty good stuff. The Dickel, not the water.

He asked about Kim’s leaving, and we went through it again, then he told me what he’d seen and heard for the last few years. Wow! I had no idea. He didn’t like Kim. Neither did Debbie. I didn’t know she was uppity and looked down at me. He said it was obvious she thought she was my superior. Love is fucking blind. Maybe lust is fucking blind. It was obviously not love. I didn’t see any of it. Stupid, stupid Charlie.

“You mean it’s supposed to be better than that?”

“You, Charlie Adams, are a fucking moron, and have been wasting your life. If you find a good woman, you’ll thank Kim for leaving you.”

“I’ve never had anything better, and anything I had was short lived. I didn’t want to be tied down while I was in.”

“I know, old buddy. I know. Here’s the truth. Your Kim is what we call a suent.”

“A suent?”

“Yes, a suent. C U N T, suent. Debbie despises that word, so we pronounce it suent, so she doesn’t pull a Kim on me and bail. In any case, you’re going to meet a good woman someday, Charlie, but don’t be an easy mark. Don’t let some bitch like Kim walk all over you. A good woman wants a good man. Not just a nice man, but a good man. Think about that.”

We spent the better part of two weeks, him running his landscaping business and me following him around the county talking about this, that, and the other. He didn’t try to play matchmaker, or anything, but one of Debbie’s friends did meet us out for dinner one night. Good thing I brought that shirt. She was nice and all, but she was even older than me, at forty-six, and to be honest, I was hoping I could get at least one child out of any deal I could pull off. I know it was asking a lot, but I wanted a son, or a daughter, or both, to go out and ruin the world in my name. Or run the world in my name. That would be up to them. I just wanted to watch.

I left them on a nice morning, packing up while Debbie was leaving for work and Ronnie was keeping me company. Once I got everything in my bags, we hugged, and he reminded me I was always welcome. With or without the wonderful woman I was going to find, he said, I was welcome. Always. I thanked him and told him to look in the back of his booze cabinet after I left. He wouldn’t let me buy much of anything, so I picked him up a fifth of Dickel, Bottled in Bond. It was supposed to be all that and a bag of corn, so I left it for him with a note to let me know what it was like.

Chapter Two - The Wood Sprite

Off I went, back to Kentucky, and the Kentucky Lake area. My mind was reeling on the windy roads that were taking me through the beautiful scenery and out of the mountains. It really is a nice place to ride.

That afternoon, I pulled into my hotel, the Quality Inn in Aurora, Kentucky, and looked around. The scenery there was absolutely wonderful, too, and it wasn’t just the trees and the hills. Here I go again. There were three women out at the pool, just catching some late afternoon sun. One of them was a little redhead. I took my things up to the room, ran out to a store for some snacks and some beer, then changed into the one swimsuit Ronnie told me to put in my bag, “Just in case”, he said. Good call, Ronnie.

I went out to the fenced in pool area, barefooted, and sat across from them. I tried not to stare, but when the little wood sprite caught me looking at her, she smiled. I returned it and gave her a little wave. Corny, I know, but somehow, it worked. She looked at her friends and said something, then came around the pool.

“Do I know you?” she asked.

“I wish.”

“Oh, do you, now? You acted like you knew me, so I thought I’d come investigate.” She held her hand out. “Maureen. Maureen O’Reilly.”

I took her hand, but just held it instead of shaking it. “Charlie. Charles Adams. I’m sorry I gave you the wrong impression. I just saw you and… You are quite striking. I have a thing for…” She interrupted me.

“One of those, huh? Redheaded women get you going, do they?”

“Get me going? I don’t know about that, but if my kids are born with red hair, I’ll die a happy man.”

“Good line. I’ll remember that one. You here for a while?”

“Not really sure. I’m running away and I don’t have a schedule.”

She looked over her shoulder at her companions. “Those are friends of mine from high school. They’re here visiting. Looking for work, actually, where I’m going to school now. They’ll be leaving and going back to Murray in a few minutes. The University put them up in a hotel there. I live right up the road a bit. You have dinner plans? I know I’m being a bit forward, but I want to know what you’re running from. I think I already do, but I want to know more.”

“I’ve heard that women can identify their counterparts’ roadkill. Sixth sense, maybe?”

“Might be, but it’s probably much more innocent than that. A nurse can identify sick people. They just know. A woman, a real woman, can see a man’s heart, even if it’s not on his sleeve. Yours isn’t. Your mention of running didn’t specify it had anything to do with another woman, yet I know.”

“Give the lady a prize.”

“Not necessary. Room number? I’ll holler when I get rid of those two and come back to get you. I’m going to assume that big Buick is not yours, and you don’t look like the Sonata type. I’ll bet that little scooter over there is your ride. How am I doing?”

“Two-twenty-two. I must be completely transparent, or you are clairvoyant.”

“Neither. I just can’t see you in a Buick, and you’re too tall for a Sonata.”

“What about the other vehicles?” I asked her.

“The Jeep is mine, the Accord is my friend’s, the Mercedes is the owner’s, the little Chevy is Tammy’s. She’s the desk clerk on duty, and the old truck is George’s. He’s the maintenance guy here. I know people. Anytime someone comes to visit, I put them up here. They let me use the pool. It’s a nice place.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

“It’s empty right now, which is odd. Normally it’s teeming with tourists.”

“Stupid virus, probably. Not everyone has taken the vaccine yet. You?”

“Yeah, I have, and you’re probably right. OK, I’m going back over there and explain to my girlfriends that I’m not a slut and that I thought we knew each other.” She started laughing. “See you around six?” I nodded. “Good. Thanks, Charlie. I’m looking forward to it for some reason. I really am.”

“I am, too, Maureen. I am, too, but I know the reason. Reasons. More than one.” I stood, took her hand again, squeezing it a bit, then watched her walk away. Really nice view, and it wasn’t the suit. She was gorgeous.

I jumped in the pool and swam for about a half an hour. It felt really good. Really good. I think the next place I live is going to have a pool.

I was done with my shower and ready to go before six. The phone rang. It was Maureen.

“Adams.”

“It’s Maureen. I’m at the bottom of the stairs.”

“I’m on the way,” I told her, hanging up and moving out.

I was not ready for what, I mean who, awaited me in the Jeep at the bottom of the stairs. “Hi again, Charlie. Thanks for this. I’ve been dying to get out and try this new place. You up for an adventure?”

I stared.

“Charlie. Up here. Say something.”

I looked up. She was beautiful. Strikingly, outrageously gorgeous. Her hair was done in a fancy braid, and she was wearing a short skirt, dark stockings, high heels, a tight button up blouse, unbuttoned just far enough to tease. She was phenomenally beautiful.

“Uhhhhh.” That was about all I could get out.

She started laughing.

“You are extremely attractive, lady. I’m sure you hear that all the time, but you truly are gorgeous. I feel like the luckiest guy in Kentucky right now. Maybe in the five-state area. Is Missouri in that?”

“Probably. Thank you. You don’t look too bad yourself. Come on. There’s a new steak joint up the road and I’m dying for a baked potato.”

“Maureen, you know if you go back to civilization, you can find those at Wendy’s, right?”

She broke up laughing. “We have one. Stop. This new place supposedly has huge Yukon bakers. Sweet, like red potatoes, but big like Idaho baking potatoes. I love potatoes.”

“How do you keep looking like that if you love potatoes?”

“I don’t eat all of the potatoes, Charlie, just some of them. I mean, if there were five potatoes in the oven, I’d only eat two of them. That makes no sense at all, does it?”

“Oh, yes, it does, and it explains why I couldn’t talk when I came downstairs. Do you carry a baseball bat in here to beat the guys off with?”

This time she really cracked up. Loud laughter while ripping through the gears on the windy road through the hills along the lake.

“I don’t beat them off, Charlie. I just tell them to go away. I need a man like a fish needs a bicycle. We’ll talk.”

We pulled up to an old log cabin looking building, but another look showed it was brand new. Just made to look like it fended off bears and was inhabited by old men with coonskin caps carrying flintlocks and skinning knives.

She gave her name for the reservation and was seated immediately. There were other people in the lobby, but evidently reservations meant something here.

“Maureen, sir, would you like to start out with a drink?”

“Yes, Stephanie, I’d like a Moscato. Charlie, you want something?”

“Sure. A double Crown rocks. Special Reserve if you have it, and a glass of ice water.” The waitress nodded and left. “She called you by your name.”

“Yeah. Uncle Bill, William to everyone else, brought her over from Willie’s. It’s a great place, too, but geared more toward family dining, and to be honest, tourists. This is supposed to be a nicer, more grown-up but still laid-back, yet upscale operation. He’s thinking about having a small band on the weekends to get the locals out more. Dinner and dancing. It might work, but I don’t care. I just need one of those potatoes.”

“Uncle Bill?”

“Yeah. I’m from around these parts, Charlie. So is Stephanie. She’s the head waitress, if you will. More of a matriarch, actually. She’s good. She graduated a few years ahead of me, but she’s really good at what she does, and Uncle Bill knows it.”

“Graduated?”

“Yeah. College. Murray State University. She has a degree. A BS in some kind of restaurant management.”

“And she’s a waitress?”

“Sort of. Like I said, she’s more of a matriarch. You’ll see her help out with a few tables tonight. Heavy hitters around town. The mayor is over in the corner, one of the guys that own the biggest bank in town is over there by the bar, and yours truly is the boss’s niece. That’s not why she’s taking care of us, though. Neither she, nor I, are that shallow. We’re friends, and she doesn’t want some new waitress to get our stuff wrong.”

“Oh. Interesting.”

“It really is. She’s a great person. OK, our drinks are here. Now, get loaded and tell me why you showed up in Kentucky, Missouri boy!”

“Missouri boy?”

“Plates on your scooter. Plus, I cheated. Tammy told me. Don’t tell on her. She’s a peach.”

“Ok, here goes. Grab your napkin. Tears may follow. If not yours, mine. I was with a beautiful woman named Kim for about three years. Engaged for about ten months. I had no inkling, no warning, no signs, no nothing. Three weeks ago, she left. Just left. No word after, either.”

“Is she alive?”

“Oh, yeah. She spoke to the landlord. Cleared her stuff out of the apartment. She’s fine. She’s just not interested in me anymore, and I have no idea why. I have a friend in North Carolina that demanded I go see him immediately. He thought I might go find a tall bridge. I didn’t, obviously. In any case, I’m on the way from there, traveling to see other friends, and forget about… Her. Can I change the subject?”

“Sure.”

“How is it you don’t have a significant other of some sort or another? You made it sound like you don’t need a man, but, Jesus, girl, you are an amazing creature. There have to be any number of men, women, aliens, and whatever, chasing after you.”

“There were. I’m not available. Not at all. I’m not gay. I’m not straight. I’m a devout student. I have no time for anyone, anything, anywhere, at any time while I’m studying. I was selected for Columbia and am leaving in August. I won’t be back for two years, and I’ll be carrying a Doctorate in Corporate Communications. There will be no one, NO ONE, I tell you, that I won’t be able to communicate with.” She started laughing. She calmed and looked straight at me. “I want to teach. Here, at home. Murray State. With a doctorate, I can. I have a job already lined up. What about you?”

“Just a program manager. A bean counter.”

“There’s more. Talk. Oooops. Stephanie is here. Tell her what you want. It’s on me.”

“Bullshit.”

“Sir, we don’t serve that here. We aim for the better cuts.” She and Maureen laughed. “You all fight over the bill. I just want to know what you want to eat.”

“Bone in ribeye, just before medium, and mixed veggies with plenty of butter. I’d like some sautéed mushrooms, too, if that’s doable.”

“Completely. Mauri?” I heard the nickname.

“Petite filet, just before medium, as well, and one of those potatoes Uncle Bill’s been bragging about. Lots of butter and sour cream. Salad with ranch, too, please.”

“Stephanie,” I added, “can I have one of those salads, too. With Italian?” I love salad but wasn’t thinking straight. I got the problem fixed in in time.

She nodded. “No problem at all. Anything else, folks?” I shook my head.

“No, Steph. Thanks.” Once again, we were alone.

“Retired Air Force. Program Controls. Contracting. Accounting. Things like that.”

“Rank?”

“Not really. No one accused me of smelling too badly.”

She cracked up laughing again. “My other uncle was in. Spill it.”

“Lieutenant Colonel.”

“Oh.”

“It’s not a bad thing. I just wasn’t in the right places at the right times. I had fun and enjoyed my stint in the service. I spent most of it in space stuff. It was good.”

“Glad to hear that. Would you stay a few days and go to dinner with me again?”

“Would you come over and spend time at the pool tomorrow?”

“Can I bring lunch?”

“Will I enjoy it?”

“If I guarantee it, will you say yes?”

“Yes.”

“Finally, a non-question! You’re a hoot, Charlie.”

A server brought dinner, a perfect dinner, so conversation was light while we ate. After dinner, she asked if I wanted to go for a ride. No complications, just a short ride to show me some of the lake. I had said earlier that I was interested, and she just wanted to show me around.

“I’d love that, Maureen, on one condition.”

“And that would be…”

“I’m buying dinner.”

“Whatever. It’s not worth arguing over.”

Cute little shit outsmarted me. We never got a check. The drive consisted of a forty-five-minute cruise around several inlets and such, all nice housing areas with views of the lake in between. The road wasn’t private, but you could tell it was very exclusive and not traveled much by anyone that didn’t live there.

“Why did you do that? At the restaurant. The bill.”

“I am woman, watch me roar, in numbers too big to ignore,” she sang.

I came back pretty quickly. “No, that’s not it. You let me open your door and get your chair for you. You aren’t a bra burner.” I coughed dramatically, “dammit.”

That got her laughing again. “No, you’re right. I’m a real woman, Charlie. You told me about your friend. My uncle is the same way. As long as I’m in school, he won’t take a dime from me. You were with me, so… In any case, don’t worry about it. When I’m rich and famous, I’m going to buy him another restaurant and make him name it Maureen’s Place or something silly like that.”

“That won’t be silly at all, and I’ll come back for that,” I teased.

“I hope so, Charlie, I really do. Does this happen a lot, by the way? Women asking you out?”

“Oh, hell no. Until I met you at the pool… Never mind, Maureen. I led a very quiet, withdrawn life until I met Kim, and was pretty much single, save a short period when I was first commissioned. Let’s just say this is not my normal, but I’m loving it.”

“Good. I’m taking you back to the hotel. I want to leave you with something, then we can talk tomorrow. I’ll be over around noon, if that’s OK.”

“Sounds wonderful, actually.”

“Again, good. I want you to think about whether or not you’d consider making love to me, knowing I’m leaving for two years and therefore won’t be that woman you need in your life. The long-term woman. The one you will use to make your babies’ hair turn red. I want you to think about that. Charlie, I’m not a slut. I’ve been very careful with my heart and my body. I won’t be tomorrow. I mean I won’t be careful tomorrow. I hope you won’t be, either.” We pulled up to the stairs that led to my door, she pulled me over the console by my shirt collar and kissed me. It was more intense for that single minute than Kim had been in three years. God, I’m glad I brought that dress shirt.

“Maureen, thank you. I’ll see you tomorrow. I hope. You just turned my entire life normal. Normal is good. I had a wonderful time this evening, and I’m truly looking forward to tomorrow. Please stay still while I come around to your side of the car.” She nodded. I went around, opened the door, took her cheeks in my hands, and kissed her again. “I’ve never felt that before. That buzz in my chest. I’m dead serious, Maureen. Go. I’ll see you tomorrow at noon.” I stepped back, she smiled, and off she went.

Damn.

I looked up at the stars as she drove away. “Thank you,” I said, raising my arms. I didn’t really know what else to say or do, but I knew I had to do something.

I slept like a baby for the first time in over two weeks. Her scent, her lips, her hair in my fingers, her hand in mine in the parking lot, her face in my hands, even her voice, all went through my mind as I laid there, wondering where I went wrong before. What didn’t I know? What didn’t I see? I woke up at seven, without benefit of the alarm, getting a full eight hours of sleep, at least. I don’t even remember what time I actually hit the sack, but it wasn’t late. She brought me back around ten.

I was lying out at the pool at eleven-thirty, catching some rays after a hard twenty-minute swim, when she arrived. Yes, I reminded myself, my next home will have a pool. She walked up to me and held her hand out. The other hand was holding a little cloth satchel. She smiled. I handed her my key card. She giggled and left, returning five minutes later wearing a different suit. This one wasn’t for her friends. It was designed to be dangerously sexxy. Sexxy with two Xs.

“Charlie, can you put some oil on my back, and maybe my bum, please?” My snicker said it all as her request, in a little girl voice, floored me.

“You are a bad girl, Miss Maureen. A very bad girl. Your little suit doesn’t have a bottom.”

“Yes, I know, sir. I ran out of cloth making it this morning and had to hurry so I wasn’t late. I’m so sorry, sir.” She giggled again. “Can I have a good morning kiss before it turns noon, Charlie. I really enjoyed last night.”

I kissed her. “Thank you, Maureen. I did, too. I’ll need another one, a good afternoon kiss in about forty-five seconds, so don’t get too busy lying there.” Another giggle. “You’re trouble. With a capital T, trouble.”

“Yeah, huh? Where are you headed next, Charlie?” she asked, as serious as I’d heard her voice up until then. She was rubbing some of her oil on my back as she spoke. Her touch was intoxicating.

“Houston, Tucson, San Diego, Sunnyvale, Eugene, Spokane, Rapid City… It’ll be kind of a loop, but I think I may come back here. This is a really pretty place. Yes, Maureen, I know when I come back you won’t be here. I’ll think of you while I’m here, but I know reality from fantasy.” She smiled at me when I said that. “That smile tells me I’m a lucky man, Mauri. It really does.”

It was around two o’clock when she turned toward me and asked if I’d swim a few laps with her then take her up for a shower and to change clothes. Of course, I agreed. She was as good at swimming as she was at making my heart pound. I had to really try to keep up with her. That was something, since I was easily ten inches taller than her. She had some legs. We met at the end of the pool, with her taking one of my ears in her fingers and kissing me soundly.

“I want this. I hope you do.”

I nodded. The walk up to my room, holding hands, told me everything I needed to know. She was happy, she was willing, she was able, and she wanted me to feel and be the same. She pulled me into the tub, pulled the curtain and pulled my swim shorts down. Since she was down there anyway, she kissed the end of a not quite soft member, then turned and asked me to undo her top and wash her back. I did it using the body wash in the dispenser on the wall and my hands, pulling her suit bottoms down when they got in my way. I washed her bottom, gently, then between her legs, one hand in front and the other in the back, as my lips nuzzled her neck, gently kissing her.

“Oh, God, she was so stupid. OH, SHIT, Charlie. I’m sorry. I had no right to say that. I…” I interrupted her.

“I’m fine. I just want you to enjoy yourself. There is nothing you could say or do to hurt me right now, save saying ‘stop’ and leaving. You are a beautiful creature. A caring, soft, warm, loving woman, and I feel like a prince right now. The kiss last night was a marvel. I wasn’t kidding. That was a new feeling for me.” All this time I was rubbing her underneath, feeling her undulating into my hands as I was whispering and kissing her neck and shoulder. I set my hand so the inside of my middle finger, the pad and knuckle, were massaging her clitoris. Her movement told me she was enjoying herself tremendously.

She screamed softly and collapsed down onto my hands. Of course, I held her up. I needed her next to me. I was already addicted to the feel of her soft, wet, slick, hot, female body on mine. Did I understand it was temporary? Absolutely. Did I want to think about that fact at that moment? Absolutely not. We were both happy. I wanted to keep it that way as long as possible.

Once she regained her legs, I washed them. Again, with my hands. Then she turned and stuck her chest out at me, smiling. I washed her breasts, arms, underarms, breasts, belly, flanks, and breasts. Yes, I went over them at least thrice. Her neck felt wonderful in my hands. I had both hands on it, around it, wrapped all the way around, soapy thumbs on her throat, gently, yet firmly massaging her, when she looked up at me and smiled. She hummed. Oh, how hot!

I took that opportunity to kiss her. She moaned again. A long, low, loud, moan. That immediately made me hard as a rock. She grabbed my erection in her hand, turned me and washed me much as I did her, jacking me off as she washed my bottom. Her fingers wandered to just behind my balls, her hand slick and rubbing my nether area. It worked. I came on her arm. We’d both last a bit longer that afternoon. She finished my body, then washed my hair, asking me to do hers when she was done. That was fun. I’d done Kim’s, but she always complained that I wasn’t doing it right. All I got from Maureen were more moans of pleasure. I was learning, I think, that there was more to life than what I’d experienced.

We spent the next two hours in bed. How that gorgeous little pixie got me to orgasm three times in two hours will be a question I will never have an answer to, but I didn’t need one.

“I’m going to apologize in advance, Charlie. I have to. I can’t let this go unsaid. That woman, the one you are looking for… When you find her, she’s going to be the happiest woman around. That Kim lady was a fool. Unless you beat her, locked her in the garage at night, and only fed her dry ramens and water, she was a fool.” She looked over at the clock on the nightstand. “I lost track of how many times you made me come. In two hours, you never once made it about you. I had to do that and did it willingly. You made it about me, over and over and over. Thank you. I want you to think about spending a week or two with me, just like last night, and this morning, and today. I think we can have some real good times together, then, when you leave, you can go knowing you have a very happy admirer, although from afar, and that Kim was a dolt.”

“I’ll stay until you get restless, Maureen. What just happened here was monumental for me. Never have I enjoyed intimacy, sex, making love, whatever we call it, as much. I have so much to learn. So much. Thank you for being here. You are a true marvel. You also taste really, and I mean REALLY, good, but you’re not all that filling. Would you take me somewhere nice for dinner? Someplace I can wear a dirty shirt and jeans?”

She started laughing. “Packing light, huh?” I nodded. “No sweat. I know just the place.” We were lying on our sides, looking at each other, her touching my chest and me rubbing her side, massaging it with my thumb and fingers. She moaned. She grinned. She pushed me over on my back, straddled me, then leaned down and kissed me. “I’m going to say this once, then try not to again. I’m going to miss you. I’ll look back at our time with amazing clarity and fondness. You are a prince among men, Charlie. I know that. No more maudlin talk. I want your cock in me one more time, just like this, then I’m going to feed you.”

She reached back under her and lifting my mostly soft manhood up, lowered herself onto it. It didn’t stay mostly soft for long. I pushed up while she was moving back and forth, scrubbing her clit at the base. She squealed after a few minutes, and I felt her spasms through the scratches she made on my chest and the contractions her vaginal walls were making on my dick. It was too much. Pain and pleasure combined to throw me over the edge one last time. I held her waist and thrusted up into her as hard as I could.

“OH, MY, GOD, CHARLIE. YESSSS. YESSS. YESS.” Her arms gave out and she collapsed on my chest. We were a mess. Sweat, blood, semen, her wonderful lubricating fluids, and even some saliva, were running every which way, creating two slimy humanoids and a serious wet spot. It was probably two minutes before she came around, moving, raising her head. She looked down. “Jesus, Charlie! Sorry about that.” She kissed the scratch marks, licking the one little place where she drew blood. “I had no idea I was doing that. Come, let me wash that off and we’ll make sure it stops bleeding. Do you have a dark red or black t-shirt?” I nodded. “Good. I’d hate to get arrested for assault.”

“I wouldn’t press charges, Maureen. I might press into you again, but…” I pulled her to me and out of bed, then picked her up in my arms and carried her to the shower. I wished it was a large enclosure instead of a tub with a curtain, but beggars can’t be choosers.

“Oh, my, mister. Where, oh where, are you taking me?”

“I’m taking you to the dungeon so I can cleanse you and have my way with you once again, my little sprite. MWAH hahaha.”

“You are such a treat.”

“I wasn’t kidding.” Her facial expression was priceless. Somewhere between fear, disbelief, and anticipation. I washed her, then put my palm on her mound, gently pushing against it until I felt her push back. That was my cue. I knelt and ate her, licking her clit and tonguing her lips to one more keening climax before I rose, washed her hair, and helped her out of the tub. I handed her a towel and backed her onto the closed toilet seat. She just sat there, towel wrapped around her, hair wet and mussed, and looked at me while I washed, then dried.

“You aren’t real,” she said, smiling.

I laughed. “You said you’d take me somewhere to eat. Somewhere other than here. I really am hungry, Maureen, and you aren’t doing a thing to fix that issue. I NEED MEAT!” I kissed her, trying not to laugh.

“Nope. Not real.”

We dried, dressed, and left in her Jeep Wrangler, her wet hair flowing behind her, drying the way God intended. At fifty miles an hour with no top or sides on the vehicle. Jesus, she’s a pretty girl.

We spent a week and a half pretty much like that. Making love with her changed my life, I’m sure. She was a giving, caring, emotional, passionate woman, opening my eyes to what could be. We had a conversation while lying in bed, her snuggled to me, both of us naked, having just culminated a wonderful session of mad crazy monkey sex. It was to be my last night there. We’d decided that when she found out she had to fly to the East Coast for some school-related thing and would be gone for three days. It seemed like a good time to bring things to a close.

“Charlie, can you understand that I’ve loved the time we’ve had together, and that I love you dearly, but I’m not IN love with you?”

“Yes, Maureen. You are not the mother of my redheaded children. I know that. I understand that, and I accept that. I love you, too. You have shown me warmth and intimacy and a life I didn’t know existed. I’ll never be able to repay you for showing me a new and different future and helping me realize goals for my upcoming relationships.”

“Well said, Charlie. I had fun and got way more out of our time than you did. You showed me a few things, too. You are a giving person, Charlie. You need to be careful not to be taken advantage of again. Find another giving person…” I interrupted her.

“Like you.”

“If you feel that way, yes, like me. Like me, but more. Better. Someone who will be your other half, your friend, your lover, your everything.”

“Better would be a stretch, Maureen, but I understand. I can’t believe an old man like me is learning so much about love and relationships from a girl half my age.”

“How old are you? You don’t look much more than thirty-five to me.”

“Forty-three. Just turned a few weeks ago. You?”

“Twenty-four. Twenty-four going on forty, according to my parents. An old soul, they say.”

“A beautiful old soul, Maureen. There is no way I can thank you enough for coming into my life. No way possible.”

“Same here, Charlie. Same here. Make love to me again, Charlie, then let’s sleep. I need to go home first thing and pack. You need to go to Houston and see your friends.”

That was a preview of Around MY World in 80 Days. To read the rest purchase the book.

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