Romancing the Clown
Devon Layne
Romancing the Clown
A story in Lazlo Zalezac’s “Damsels in Distress” Universe
Devon Layne
Elder Road Books Lynnwood WA
Copyright ©2016 2020 Elder Road Books
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopy, recording, or any information storage and retrieval system, without permission from the publisher.
Requests for permission to make copies of any part of the work should be submitted online to: Elder Road LLC, ElderRoadBooks@outlook.com.
Design by Nathan Everett
Cover art by Cool_Photo, licensed from Shutterstock, ID: 367513337
ISBN 978-1-950183-74-6
Romancing the Clown is available in print as part of the single volume
The Hero Lincoln Trilogy ISBN 978-1-950183-67-8
Cast
HERE IS A LIST of the continuing characters in this tril- ogy and of the new characters in this episode.
Continuing Characters:
Lincoln: the hero. Former paraplegic. Actor, singer, guitarist, juggler, magician.
Lisa: the earthly caretaker. Lincoln’s sister-in-law and Cadence’s mother. Has nursed Lincoln since his injury and supervised his healing at Crossroads. She has been unable or unwilling to get rid of her abusive husband.
Cadence: the companion. Lincoln’s niece and lover.
Wilson: Lisa’s ne’er-do-well husband and Lincoln’s older brother. Always either out of town or drunk, it seems.
Persephone: Lincoln’s caretaker on Crossroads, advising him regarding missions, loving him when he is present, healing him when he returns, and facilitating his impregnation of the damsels he rescues. Brilliant teenage intellectual with degrees in several areas.
Gabe and Raphe: the innkeeper brothers on Chaos who work for Lincoln.
New characters
Al Pesciano: the boss. Dies at the beginning. Turns out to be the reason Lisa has stayed loyal to Wilson.
Bandy: the circus midget. Runs the circus on Chaos and has the damsel as his personal slave. Has an iron hand and a bodyguard. Everyone in the circus fears him.
Cathy Temp: the damsel in distress for whom nothing has ever gone quite right. Never able to hold down a job nor get ahead, was sent to Chaos as a kind way to let her die without hurting anyone else.
Legs: the dancer. Short for Allegra, niece of Niccolò.
Thorin: Allegra’s bodyguard. Trained by Duke Niccolò.
Niccolò: The Duke. Runs the citadel High Castle and trains troops to guard the southern frontier.
Saul, Melody, and Harmony: the kids. Brother and two sisters forced to be cutpurses.
Lord Chang: Danny Sun’s companion. Stranded on Chaos when Sun was killed in the slaver war. Now a warlord in the South.
Mrs. Smith: Lincoln’s next-door neighbor. Elderly grandmother type with a slightly bawdy sense of humor.
1
Send in the Clowns
“PERSEPHONE!” I screamed as we stumbled into the white entrance room. “Healing chamber. NOW!” A panel in the wall opened and I carried Lisa through to the open healing chamber. As I put her into the chamber, Persephone came running into the room, naked and dripping wet.
“What happened? Oh, no! Lisa!”
“She’s been beaten,” I explained. Persephone slammed the lid shut on the chamber and it silently went about its task.
It started with our fourth mission to Chaos. We went on missions in the morning while Cadence was in school and we’d been gone nearly a year on Chaos, even though only fifteen minutes had passed at home. We were supposed to decompress at Crossroads, but things hadn’t worked out well. After carefully maintaining our disguises and chasing our quarry for a year, our damsel fell off her fucking horse and broke her neck. We had only enough time at Crossroads to be processed quickly through the healing chamber and then sent home.
It had been a brutal mission from the outset and Lisa had not fared well.
She vomited into the toilet again as I held her hair out of her face. I was sure there was nothing left there to come out, but she kept heaving, crying, heaving. When she’d pretty much passed out, I grabbed a wash cloth to clean her face and then carried her to the bed. I lay beside her and held her while she slept.
She wasn’t drunk. She wasn’t pregnant.
She was sick with disgust.
“I killed him,” Lisa whimpered in her sleep.
Well, that was an understatement. Lisa eviscerated the man who held our damsel captive. She didn’t break any rules as far as any of us could tell. He’d attacked her. And she disassembled him. He was begging for mercy… begging for her to kill him… when she finally wrapped his intestines around his neck and hung him by them. I’d had all I could do to beat down the guards at the damsel’s door. Lisa had heard a cry from the next room and opened the door. That’s when he attacked her.
She stirred and woke, still whimpering.
“It’s okay, Lisa. You did well. It’s a different world and he deserved to die.”
“You fucking better believe he deserved to die. I killed him. He should have suffered longer. I should have squeezed the contents of his bowels into his mouth. He should still be suffering. But I killed him and let him off easy,” she screamed.
Well, that wasn’t exactly what I expected. Lisa hadn’t washed the blood and guts off her arms by the time we got to the bank after Damsel Beatrice decided to show us what a great horsewoman she was and jumped a fence—without the horse. All that we went through and still didn’t rescue the damsel. I swear that some of these women have nothing in their heads at all.
“You killed him. That was the important part.”
“Did you see what he did to those little girls?” Lisa screamed.
“He was an animal,” I said.
“To make them watch while he selected one and… made them watch… while he… did that. And then we ran away with Miss Piss-for-brains. Those children won’t even get counseling. They’ll grow up thinking that’s what they should do! And all I did was kill him! They’re probably all dead or raped by now. More likely both. I hate that fucking place!”
“Lisa, we don’t have to go back,” I tried to soothe her.
“Not go back? And know there are people in need like that? We should go back and hell with the damsels. They chose to be there. We should just stay there and put things right.”
“It’s just you and me, Lisa. We can’t reform a world. We can just make the little corners where we intersect it better if we can.”
I held her for a while longer. Lisa and I had become comfortable with our nudity around each other, so we’d rinsed in the shower before she started throwing up.
“I’m better now. Thank you. Just hope no one crosses me today or there will be more bloodshed. Unfortunately, they frown on that in this world,” she said. “I need to get groceries and you need to go to work. I’ll be fine.”
There wasn’t much else I could do. Tonight, I would rest in Cadence’s arms and tell her about the mission. In just two weeks, she would be out of school, a high school graduate. And tomorrow, she would be eighteen.
Cadence knew something was up, of course. She started to ask a question, but I hushed her and asked her to wait until bed. We had a low-key celebration for such an important birthday, in my opinion. The number one gift that Cadence wanted, we’d all agreed would come after graduation in two weeks.
Cadence wanted to go to Crossroads and Chaos.
Based on our most recent experience, Lisa was either going to forbid her to go, or turn her into an armed menace. The one thing that we had all done and done well was train. Just anticipating her chance to go to Chaos had turned Cadence into a very different young woman than she’d been a year ago.
And believe me, that wasn’t a bad thing. She still maintained the sense of lightness and teasing from before I had any feeling in my legs. Occasionally, she would give me a massage and prop my foot against her bare breast, relishing the feeling of me squeezing her nipple with my toes. The first time she’d done that, I nearly cried from trying to get my toes to work. Now I was becoming pretty skilled at manipulating the little nubs on her breasts with my toes. And she liked it.
I don’t think a night had gone by since my first visit to Crossroads that Cadence and I didn’t make love. I still made sure we spent time together doing her schoolwork. We went out. We had dinner as a family with Lisa. But Cadence’s extracurricular activities had changed. We went to the archery range on Tuesday and Thursday nights. She worked at the dojo on Wednesday afternoon when school was out early and we all practiced various combat techniques each morning. Where other young lovers played soft music and had romantic dinners, we had knife throwing competitions. She was good.
Cadence was always beautiful in my eyes. I think in the eyes of the rest of the world, too. But I’d seen her grow up and transform from cute pre-teen to hot teenager and now to absolute hard-body. Her breasts stood out against her lean frame and rippling muscles. It would be impossible to disguise her as a boy when we went to Chaos like we did with Lisa. Even with hair pulled back in a ponytail, she was all woman. Deadly woman.
“What happened?” Cadence asked when we slipped into bed at last.
“We had a bad adventure on Chaos,” I said.
“You went again without me!” she pouted.
“You know we promised to take you after graduation. It’s very important to Lisa. And I won’t let her back down no matter what. I don’t expect we’ll go back after this last one until you go with us. She’s pretty depressed.”
“I know why you go back,” Cadence giggled.
“The reward is fun, but getting anonymous women pregnant is not the motivator. I think that if you pointed a Cassandran woman at a fence post and told her it could get her pregnant, she’d hump it and have an orgasm, even if it was strung with barb wire,” I said.
Our most recent adventure had rather put me off Cassandran women. As soon as the guards were dead and Lisa had hung the tormentor, she had suddenly transformed from a damsel in distress to a spoiled brat who had just won a beauty contest. She pushed us out of the house before we’d even had a chance to collect any spoils or make sure the place was secure. She was mounted and egging us on, forcing us to try to catch up with her. I never hit a woman, but I was seriously considering stripping her naked and lacing her backside with the reins until she bled. It would all get healed at Crossroads anyway.
Yes, Chaos distorts your sense of reality. I actually was thinking that teaching her a couple of lessons would be a heroic act.
Then she taught herself a final lesson.
“I know it’s not just fucking new pussies that keeps you motivated. You have one that’s still almost brand new right here,” Cadence said. She pushed me back and mounted me, sighing as we joined. Then she slowed the pace so we could keep talking. “It’s Mom.”
“She has bought into the whole plight of Cassandra mythology. She seriously believes I am providing an important public service by rescuing damsels and knocking them up,” I laughed. I liked the feeling of my cock bobbing in and out of Cadence when one of us laughed.
“Linc, are you blind? Neither one of you go there for the damsels. You go for Persephone.”
“Don’t be jealous, honey.”
“I’m not jealous of Persephone. I’m a little jealous that you have her in your life and mother is head over heels in love with her, and I haven’t met her to fall in love yet.”
“Lisa’s in love?”
“You didn’t get to spend time with Persephone at Crossroads when you finished your mission, did you?” Cadence asked.
“No. You don’t get time there if you don’t bring back a damsel.”
“That’s what has Mom most upset. Linc, Mom loves you. If it wasn’t for her stupid vow, she’d be in this bed, riding this cock, instead of me.” I actually believed that. Lisa and I were close. Intimate. We just never crossed that line. “But with Persephone? I don’t think Mom believes having an alien woman as a lover breaks her vow, and she is completely and absolutely in love. Failing to bring back a damsel means that Mom couldn’t have time with Persephone. While you spend twelve hours a day trying to get your damsel pregnant, the two of them spend the time together. It’s as if I came home from school one night, stripped and beckoned you to the bedroom, then turned around and left. You’d feel robbed.”
“I don’t only think of you sexually,” I defended myself.
“Pull your hard cock out of my tight pussy and tell me that.”
Certain things from our training and from preparing for Chaos seemed to slip into our everyday lives. Like Cadence’s wardrobe. It was touch and go with Lisa, but Cadence was never going to pass as a man on Chaos. No way could you bind those tits tightly enough to hide them. At least and have her still able to breathe.
So, Cadence fancied herself a warrior woman. She’d been taking swordsmanship classes each week, but couldn’t wait for Persephone to give her instruction in swordsmanship for battle instead of swordsmanship for competition. She’d become a competent archer. She could handle herself in a knife fight, but was better at throwing them. She could conceal weapons in places that would get me killed before I discovered what was there. Cadence could pass a pencil test with her firm boobs, but the soft flesh could easily hold a hatpin. That looked lethal!
After her eighteenth birthday, she came to the breakfast table wearing tight leather trousers, knee-high boots, a linen shirt, and a leather vest. When we saw her, Lisa and I both checked her thoroughly for weapons. That was strictly verboten in high school. She put on a leather cap and picked up her schoolbag. I stopped her.
“Wait.” She paused and looked at me. I walked around her and carefully examined her clothes. “No metal.”
“Pretty cool, huh? I want to test the outfit out to make sure I give exactly the right impression. If anyone touches me, I’ll know it’s not right yet.”
“Just be very careful. In addition to looking dangerous, you look very sexy,” I said. Lisa wagged her head. Cadence went to school.
It would be a good night to go out and celebrate.
“I want to be a hero,” Cadence said flatly. “I’ve read all the rules and I am in good health and of heroic character. I just need a sapphire ring. May I borrow yours, Linc?”
“A. No. B. No matter what kind of character and health you have, there is the simple matter of having to impregnate a damsel. You simply aren’t equipped for the task,” Lisa said. I was glad she took over that line. I was pretty sure that me telling Cadence that she couldn’t be a hero would end up with me being the bad guy. Lisa was… well, she was still Mom. In a way, she was always the bad guy.
“Maybe I can go to Chaos and just be a vigilante, then,” Cadence suggested. “Linc can take me through and I’ll just go off and fight for truth, justice, and the American way.”
“You know Superman was supposed to be made of steel?”
“Yeah.”
“Steel won’t go through the portal.”
“Besides,” Lisa said, “you need to be there a few times and to study the books more. If you stay there, then there’s no guarantee Linc can ever find you again. It’s not like you can text him and tell him where to pick you up.”
“Not to mention the fact that if you screw up, they could just decide to leave you there,” I said. “It’s happened before. I know we sound like old biddies, but it scares the bejeezus out of me. I don’t want to lose either one of you. In a way, I hate the idea of taking you at all. Either of you.”
“And understand this, young lady,” Lisa said sternly. “Chaos has a set of rules. They are pretty liberal. You can get away with rape, murder, and torture on that planet. And you can right that wrong by the simple expedient of killing the wrong-doer. God knows, I’ve done it. Earth has a different set of rules. Don’t ever think you can kill someone who attacks you on Earth and take everything they own. It doesn’t work that way.”
“I know that,” Cadence said. “I wouldn’t act that way on Earth.”
“It’s easy for the lines to get blurred. There are times when I’ve reached for a knife.”
“That’s why I want to go. I’m sure that the injustices of life on this planet pale by comparison to what I would find on Chaos. Therefore, I would no longer look upon this world with despair for our race, as I would see what humans could truly devolve to and would realize how wonderful and noble we here on Earth actually are.” Cadence held our eyes. I supposed that could be a way to look at it. Then she started laughing.
“It’s funny here,” Lisa sighed, “but it’s deadly serious there.”
“We should send all our presidential candidates to Chaos and tell them they have to survive in order to run for office. Maybe that would thin the field.”
“More likely it would make it more dangerous for heroes to go to Chaos,” I said.
That night I made love to an eighteen-year-old.
Two men in dark suits came to the door on Sunday afternoon a week later. They looked like a caricature of the way FBI agents are portrayed with dark glasses and a noticeable bulge under their jackets. Except their suits actually fit. Very well. And they were polite.
“We’d like to speak to Lisa Reynolds, please,” one said. “We simply have a letter to deliver from an acquaintance.” He held an envelope with Lisa’s name on it. There was no address or stamp.
“I’ll give it to her,” I said. I didn’t reach for the envelope. I fully expected them to get pushy and I already had a knife in my hand behind my back. They hesitated while they looked at each other. The speaker sighed.
“This must really look terrible,” he said. “Seriously, we have to give the letter directly to her and pass on Al’s message.”
“What is it, Linc?” Lisa asked as she came up beside me. I saw that Cadence had parked herself in the kitchen doorway and had her bow drawn with an arrow nocked.
The guys stayed very still.
“Mrs. Reynolds,” the speaker said, still holding the letter. “This is from Big Al. He asked us to place it in your hands only. I’m sorry we look so threatening standing out here. It’s part of the business.” Lisa came up to the door and took the letter.
“Why is he sending me something?”
“He’s dead, ma’am. He’s paid us for two years just to be ready to come to you the minute he died. He said it was important and you would know what to do.” He paused for a moment. “I’m sorry, ma’am.” The two guys turned and left. Lisa stood there with her hands shaking. I pushed the door closed.
“Lisa? Honey, what is it? Who is Big Al?”
“It’s nothing,” Lisa said firmly. “A youthful indiscretion. That’s the end of it.”
“That can’t be the end of it,” Cadence said. “Mom, why were those two clowns at our door?”
“If you think those two handsome men were clowns, I’ve definitely failed in your education. Those were lawyers. Now if you let me be, I’ll go to my room and find out exactly what my very personal letter says.” Lisa brushed past us and left Cadence and me with our mouths open.
She didn’t come out of her room until morning.
Monday morning, I was up first. After making sure Cadence had been kissed from head to toe, front and back, I went to the kitchen to make breakfast while she showered and dressed. It was the last full week of school and seniors had graduation practice but no classes. Graduation was slated for Sunday afternoon.
I liked cooking breakfast. It made me feel like I was contributing something to the running of our household. Sure. I owned the house and I paid for the groceries. I was the only one in the family with a steady, if meager, income from the game store. Somehow, I’d just never bothered to look for another job now that I was physically capable of handling one. Carol, the store manager, didn’t seem surprised, and kept my work hours pretty much the same. I was doing more in the store now, though. The low table where I used to sit in my wheelchair had been removed. That gave me a good space to demonstrate magic tricks and entertain kids. Sometime, maybe I’d take on an apprentice.
Lisa retained absolute control over dinners. She said it was her responsibility to have a healthy meal for her family each night. I think we all looked forward to meal time together more than anything else we did. I wasn’t super creative about breakfast. I made coffee. I got Cadence to eat good food even when she’d insisted that she needed to lose weight. I pointed out that muscle weighs more than fat and that the only real way she could lose weight was to lose muscle. Unless she wanted a mastectomy, and I objected to that. She ate the meals I fixed.
She was dressed in her leathers again. Only these were red instead of brown like the ones she’d worn last week.
“How many sets of those do you have?” I asked.
“Five. I made a set each in black, red, and green. I have two sets in brown, though they are slightly different shades. I never want to be the girl who wears the same clothes every day,” Cadence laughed.
“Oh, my. The girls in school must hate you,” Lisa sighed. “I know I would have at your age.”
“Why?” Cadence asked. She was truly clueless.
“When my boyfriend was making love to me, I wanted him to be thinking of me, not some hot chick in leather. Can you bend in that?” Lisa demanded. Cadence demonstrated how supple—and how sturdy— the tight trousers were when she bent over and touched her nose to her knees. They didn’t even ride down to expose her butt.
“You made love to a boyfriend in high school?” Cadence asked from her bent over position. Lisa smacked her on the butt.
“Not a topic we’re going to discuss this morning,” Lisa said. “Honey, I need you to run an errand for me today. I know you have your martial arts class but this is something special. Could you do this for me?” Lisa handed a page of instructions to Cadence and she looked them over.
“What’s this, Mom?”
“It is a quest. A task Seph created to see if you are truly ready to go to Chaos,” she said. She handed Cadence the little wooden chest I’d received from Seth with his journals and the rule books for Crossroads. “Get anything else you need ready.”
“Hey!” I said. My journal, though there were only five entries, was in that box as well.
“Don’t worry,” Lisa said. “It will come back to you with Cadence. Of course, if she doesn’t come back, then there’s no use anyway.”
“Mom!” Cadence yelled.
“Treat it seriously, Cadence,” Lisa said. “I’m not going to have you going to Chaos next week unless I know for a fact that you can handle yourself in unfamiliar conditions. Now go.”
“Wait, you didn’t frisk me for weapons,” Cadence laughed. “Won’t you frisk me, Linc?”
It was impossible to refuse that task. Of course, by the time I was through frisking, we were running late.
“So, what was that all about?” I asked Lisa. “Did Persephone really design a test for her?”
“Well, we discussed one. We were going to work on it after the last mission. But… That didn’t turn out so well.”
“Lisa, you aren’t telling me something.”
She pushed the morning newspaper over to me. She’d folded it over to the second page of the business section. It was an odd place for an obituary. “Al Pesciano Succumbs to Cancer.” It wasn’t a real long piece for a guy who was known to be behind all the major business and political deals in town. I didn’t know him. I mean, everyone knew who he was. He was supposedly ‘the power behind the throne,’ as they say. We elected officials. He owned them. Rumor had it that he owned the illegal side of business in town, too, but it was strictly rumor. For a city our size, we had very few drug, gang, or prostitution problems. Not that it was Utopia, just that it never seemed to infringe on polite society.
“So, aside from the fact that he was an important figure, what does ‘Big Al’s death have to do with us? Or you?” I asked.
“Your brother worked for Al. I would guess that he will be back in town tonight and will be putting together his run at taking over the business. It’s what he’s been waiting for. I want Cadence out of the way when he storms into town,” Lisa said.
“So, the task?”
“She’ll be gone overnight for the next two nights. By then, we should know what Wilson plans to do. I’m filing for divorce this afternoon.”
“Really? Lisa, you are really going to ditch him now?”
“With Al’s death, my vows came to an end.”
I was antsy all day. Lisa was used to dealing with Wilson and I was reasonably certain she already had the divorce papers ready to file. But what did it mean? When she said her vows came to an end, it seemed like a clear indication that nothing would hold us apart now. But was that it? Or would Lisa insist that I was strictly with Cadence and she wouldn’t be a part of it? She’d sent Cadence away for the night.
I sighed. I needed to talk to her. Even though our love was a known quantity, I wasn’t about to make love to Lisa without Cadence even knowing. Cadence and I had to talk, too.
The afterschool crowd was all headed home for dinner and Carol was getting ready for the evening gamers. They tended to be older and she had a couple dedicated gamers who helped in the store in the evenings. I closed out my register and headed home.
“Where is she?” Wilson demanded. I heard a slap and Lisa scream.
“Where you’ll never find her!”
I was powering my way up the walk when I saw two shadows moving in the dining room. They were bulky and when I got a good look through the door, I could see they were a lower class version of the two guys who had visited yesterday.
“I’m taking custody of her. You filed for divorce. Our agreement is clear. You screwed up, bitch.” Another thud and groan. “Our minor daughter now belongs to me.”
“She’s not a minor, you idiot.”
“Her birthday is coming on Wednesday. That’s plenty of time for me to take control.”
“Do you think Al would ever have told you her real birthday? She’s been eighteen for a week.”
“Fuck!” Another hit. I ran to the back door. No one was in the kitchen. I slipped in and worked my way quietly to the dining room door. The two thugs were still checking out everything they could put their hands on and breaking most of it. They’d moved closer to the bedroom.
“Where’s the will?” Another hit. I needed to get to Lisa.
I just walked into the room like I owned it—actually I did—and grabbed the nearest thug by the arm. I twisted hard enough to hear the shoulder pop out of joint and then propelled him through the front door head first. I swung on the second who was still looking up.
“Follow him willingly or on a stretcher. Which will it be?”
“You little shit,” he growled as he reached beneath his jacket for a gun. I didn’t need that crap. The gun fell from his hand as he pulled it out and he looked at the knife stuck through his wrist.
There was another scream from the bedroom.
“I don’t have time to wait for a stretcher,” I said. I twisted the knife loose, grabbed his bloody wrist and threw him through the door to join his buddy on the sidewalk. Then I turned and slammed through the bedroom door. Lisa was stretched unconscious on the bed with her clothes torn. Wilson had his hand back to hit her again. It didn’t reach its target. He straightened and then bent over backward as I planted my foot hard enough against his balls for him to taste them. I grabbed the back of his collar and threw him against the wall then ran to Lisa. She was unconscious; her breath was thready.
“You’ve done it this time, Wilson,” I said. “If she doesn’t recover, I’ll dismember you and force feed you your own limbs.”
“That’s my wife, little shit,” Wilson said. “Get away from her.”
“Ex-wife,” I shouted. “I know you’ve already been served. Now you’ll go to jail.”
“Like hell!” Wilson was struggling to get to a gun while still gasping for breath. I couldn’t wait.
I picked up Lisa and ran into the wardrobe. I heard the spit of a silenced gunshot and wood splintered behind me.
2
Tears of a Clown
PERSEPHONE SLAMMED THE LID shut on the cham- ber and it silently went about its task. She monitored a screen.
“She was barely alive. Ruptured kidney, broken ribs, concussion, reproductive damage, bruised heart, punctured lung. What happened, Hero Lincoln?”
“I don’t understand everything. It was her husband and now I’m going back to kill him.” I went back into the antechamber and headed to the portal. Nothing happened. “Fuck!” I yelled. “Computer, let me through the portal.”
“Lincoln. Lincoln, my darling. You can’t go back through the portal until you’ve been to Chaos. You know the rules. Computer can’t just override them,” Persephone said softly as she stroked my back.
“But he could get hold of Cadence!” I yelled. “I need to go back and stop him.”
“It makes no difference, Lincoln. No matter how much or how little time you spend here, you will re-enter your world exactly fifteen minutes from when you left. It is always that way. Come, my love. We must get Lisa Caretaker healed and get you pulled together. We need a strategy and direction for how to approach your enemy. Then we need to select a mission, get you trained for it, and execute it. When you have given the damsel her reward, you and Lisa will return to Earth to right the wrongs there.”
I sighed. She was right of course. Time on Crossroads and Time on Chaos were unpredictable. I could be gone weeks on Earth and spend weeks with Persephone then arrive on Chaos the day after I last left. On the other hand, we’d rushed back after our first mission and nearly two years had passed on Chaos. Only the time that would pass on Earth was fixed. I’d tried to comprehend how other heroes compared to my timeline, but became hopelessly lost in the process. It had to do with the prohibition of heroes working together. That had once been bent when a number of heroes needed to be in one place in order to fight the slavers, but then those heroes seemed to part and rejoin their own timelines again. The only ones constant were the hero and his companion. Since the companions traveled on the same ticket as the hero, their time was the same.
I’d begun to believe that Crossroads itself was suspended in time—or perhaps outside of time. It was the only way it seemed to make sense to have it act as a central clearinghouse for the three planets. I’d have to see if I could get Computer to test my theory somehow.
It gave me a headache.
“Of course. I’m sorry, Sephie. It’s just that the past day has been strange. And now I am worried about Cadence. Lisa and I didn’t plan to come back until Cadence could come with us. Last night two men came to our door to tell us that a man I’d only ever heard of had died and handed Lisa a letter. This morning, Lisa sent Cadence on a quest she said you helped design and told me she was divorcing her husband and her vows were completed. When I got home this evening, her husband and two goons were beating the crap out of her and demanding to know where Cadence was and where the will was,” I complained.
“We’ll figure it out.” Seph kissed me on the cheek. For the first time, I realized she was still naked and a bit damp.
“Did I interrupt your shower?” I asked as I gently stroked her soft skin.
“When you were here last, Lisa introduced me to the idea of a hot soaking bath. Why did I never think of getting in water unless it was to swim? Would you care to join me? Lisa will not be out of the chamber for four more hours.”
“Won’t the water be cold by now?”
“Computer, restore water temperature to one hundred degrees Fahrenheit in the tub.”
“Yes, Caretaker Persephone.” I followed Seph to the tub and we sank into its depths. She distracted me from my funk, and long before the chamber chimed, I sank into Seph’s depths as well.
Physically, Lisa was healed. Emotionally, she was a wreck. Mentally, I just wasn’t sure she was all there. She’d just been beaten on Earth more violently than we’d seen on Chaos. And by someone she knew—been intimate with—even if she didn’t trust him
Seph and I took turns feeding her, bathing her, and grooming her, before finally giving up and sandwiching her between us in bed. Lisa lay there, motionless. I think she slept.
In the morning, I slipped out of bed and left Lisa with Seph. I figured a woman’s touch might be more positive than mine. When I had finished in the bathroom and went into the main area, a table was set with breakfast for me. Apparently Seph had left instructions.
I ate, silently, and alone. I didn’t really taste the food, though I’m sure Computer did a great job. At home, I’d listen to Cadence and Lisa as they prepared for their day. I’d read the newspaper and get ready to train in one or more of my disciplines. In the afternoon, I’d go to my job at the game store.
Home.
My life had changed in the past year. From being confined to wheelchair with no feeling from my chest down, I’d become fit and capable. I had both Cadence and Persephone as lovers. Lisa and I were intimate on Crossroads and Chaos, even though we didn’t have intercourse. And I’d fathered four children. I should say I sired them. Bred their mothers. I’d never be a father to them. I didn’t even know if any had actually been born yet. I’d spent much more time on Chaos and Crossroads than I had on Earth.
And now, on Earth, a goon squad was between me and finding Cadence to protect her. I would have to take Lisa back with me into their ambush. We could both be killed as we stepped out of the wardrobe into my bedroom.
Not that we could get back to Earth. We couldn’t return to Earth until we’d been to Chaos, rescued a damsel, and got her pregnant. Then we had to move fast.
I sighed.
“Hero Lincoln, would you care to train? Persephone Caretaker has left instructions that you should have access to the gym, the archery range, and the weapons room. Alternatively, I have your cards and associated magic paraphernalia. Should Persephone Caretaker be unavailable when you are hungry, simply say so and a meal will be served.”
“Thank you, Computer. I suppose I should do something. I’ll start in the gym and get a workout.”
I went through the open door and spent the next hour lifting and running. After that, I headed for the archery range. I alternated between activities that required steadiness and control with those that required action and speed. Back to tumbling mats. On to knife throwing. Then to martial arts katas, a good combination of both control and action. I headed to the shower and then to lunch. The bedroom was empty, but I didn’t see Seph and Lisa in any of the rooms I walked through. When I got to the table, Sephie joined me.
“Lisa is asleep. Oh, Lincoln, it’s all caught up with her. She has deprived herself all these years for the sake of her daughter and then her husband tried to kill her. It wasn’t a case of just beating her. He actually wanted her dead. I don’t understand it, but he stands to gain something if she is out of the way,” Sephie said. “She loves you, Lincoln. She just needs to get through this rough patch.”
“I love her, Sephie. I always have. But you know I love you, too, don’t you?”
“Oh yes, my hero. And when we have eaten, I will show you how much I love you.”
We made love the rest of the day. Lisa joined us for dinner. She was quiet, but some life showed in her eyes. At night, Seph and I held her between us.
“Exercise is a powerful antidepressant, Lisa,” Seph said as we went into the gym. “Let’s start with something you don’t have to focus too hard on. We’ll run.” And run we did. The treadmill in the gym was much different than what I’d encountered in other health clubs. For one thing, it had no side bars or rails to hold onto. It was just the platform. Even that was different. It was curved and slightly sloped up in front. The device was not electric, but worked strictly on the basis of gravity. We started walking, but as soon as we were used to the motion of the treadmill, we picked up speed to a jog and eventually to a gentle run. It was a great machine.
Crossroads has slightly lower gravity than Earth, but within the heroes’ quarters—including the gym—the gravity was Earth-norm. Computer would gradually increase our workout level over the next few weeks as we built ourselves up to go to Chaos.
And Seph was right. Exercise helped work Lisa out of her depression, though she refused to reveal any details of her vows or what set Wilson off. Lisa threw herself into the aerobic workouts and was fast becoming a dangerous woman when we started weapons practice. We each took turns in the healing chamber before the end of the first week.
“We need a mission,” Lisa said firmly. “I need to go kill someone.”
“Lisa Caretaker,” Seph said softly. “Our job is to take care of Hero Lincoln. You travel with him as his caretaker, not as an adventurer. The portal won’t even let you through if you go with that intent.”
“I know!” Lisa barked. She looked at me and there was such longing in her eyes that I reached out to her. Lisa came to me and I held her. “I just need to be doing something worthwhile. There are times when I feel so worthless.”
“I love you, Lisa. Cadence loves you. Persephone loves you. I know that isn’t a balm that soothes away all those feelings of worthlessness. But it’s a place to start building. God knows, I felt helpless and worthless for enough years. I felt like I was a burden to everyone around me. But you got me through that. We’ll get you through this.”
“I would make love to you right now if we’d had a chance to talk to Cadence,” Lisa said. “You know I can’t have sex with you before we’ve talked to her.”
“Yes. It’s one thing to agree theoretically to a situation when you know it is unlikely to ever occur. It is another to face the reality that it will happen. But Lisa, let Seph and me love you like we can.”
Lisa yielded to us and Seph gave me a brilliant smile over Lisa’s shoulder. We took her to the shower and lavished our love upon her. Lisa responded with a kind of intensity that bordered on desperation. She clutched me to her and kissed me while Seph dove between her legs. Her orgasms were almost as fast and intense as a Cassandran damsel’s. She ate Seph as Seph sucked me. When I fucked Seph, Lisa rode her face. When we were beyond even the stage of contemplating another restorative, Lisa scooted down toward our waists and held my cock in her mouth, softly nursing as she went to sleep.
Our afternoon and night of sex—let’s face it, plus the next day—seemed to get Lisa over the hump of her depression, though she was still prone to space out a little as she contemplated Earth and our future. Before we began looking at missions, we worked on plans for our return to Earth. Our one advantage was that we knew we would re-enter the room fifteen minutes after I had rushed out with Lisa in my arms. They didn’t know if or when we would return.
Our disadvantage was that we had no idea what they would be doing when we got there. Wilson’s goons might well be recovered enough to help him again, if they ever got up. Neighbors might have become suspicious and called the police. Reinforcements might have arrived. Everyone might have left. Wilson could be standing in the door of the wardrobe looking for us. They might all be waiting with guns trained on the portal. We simply had no idea what to expect. Only that it would be bad and could be fatal.
Persephone was just as ruthless in pushing our training as Lisa had been in getting trained. I was concerned about the bulk I’d put on. It was going to be harder to play the crippled minstrel. It was never a problem for me to act crippled. I’d been that way for too long. But now it was all too easy to jump, dance, and tumble. I felt great and was actually looking forward to some acrobatics. But my canes might not fool anyone. That meant we needed a strategy for our new act. Being a crippled minstrel had given me almost a free ride through Chaos. It was obvious that I didn’t have anything worth stealing or killing me for.
Partially as a result of my act, I had not amassed much wealth on my previous four trips to Chaos. I didn’t attract a lot of fights and had stolen my damsels most of the time. On the last trip, my damsel had not given me time to collect any spoils. I was seriously considering tying up the next damsel and carrying her across the back of a mule. I think Lisa would help with that.