Good Medicine - Sophomore Year
Michael Loucks
Contents
Copyright © 2015-2023 Michael P. Loucks
Сам Себя Издат
First publication date: 2019-05-15
First revision publication date: 2023-12-15
You may contact the author at: author@michaelloucks.com
https://a-well-lived-life.com/
Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson.
Used by permission. All rights reserved.
While this story was inspired by actual persons and events, certain characters, characterizations, incidents, locations, and dialog were fictionalized or invented for the purposes of dramatization.
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For Jennifer
Other Books in This Series
Freshman Year
Sophomore Year
Junior Year
Senior Year
Medical School I
Medical School II
Medical School III
Medical School IV
Residency I
Residency II (*)
- Work in Progress
Other Books by Michael Loucks
A Well-Lived Life, Series I
Book 1 - Birgit
Book 2 - Jennifer
Book 3 - Pia
Book 4 - Bethany
Book 5 - Stephanie
Book 6 - Kara I
Book 7 - Kara II
Book 8 - Stephie
Book 9 - Anala
Book 10 - The Wife
A Well-Lived Life, Series 2
Book 1 - Bethany
Book 2 - Stephie
Book 3 - Jessica
Book 4 - Elyse
Book 5 - Michelle
Book 6 - Samantha
Book 7 - Sakurako
Book 8 - NIKA
Book 9 - Kami
Book 10 - Bridget
A Well-Lived Life Series 3
Book 1 - Suzanne
Book 2 - The Inner Circle
Book 3 - A New World
Book 4 - Coming of Age
Book 5 - The Pumpkin Patch
Book 6 - The World Turned Upside Down
Cliimbing the Ladder
Book 01 - The First Rung
Book 02 - The Second Rung
Book 03 - Climbing Higher\
Book 04 - Chutes and Ladders (*)
From the Files of Doctor Fran Mercer (*+)
A Sailor's Diary
Book 1 - The War Years (*+)
- Work in Progress
+ Available exclusively on Patreon or BuyMeACoffee
I. Home Again
May 28, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
"Why the long face, Mike?" Mom asked. "You've been home less than two hours."
"On the drive back, I was thinking about the Fall."
"I thought that would make you happy. Jocelyn will be at Taft with you."
"What's the phrase?" I asked with a sigh. "A curse and a blessing?"
"What could possibly be wrong that would cause you to say THAT about Jocelyn?"
"I get up on weekday mornings and run with Angie, then we say morning prayers. Lunch is with the gang, as is dinner. Angie goes to karate with me on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons, as well as Saturday mornings. I meet after dinner with my study group, which goes until around 11:00pm. Then Angie and I say our evening prayers. I go out with Katy on Fridays, the gang on Saturdays, and Melody on Sundays. Melody and I hang out in our free time, and she spends a couple of nights a week with me."
"So you have no time for Jocelyn," Mom said matter-of-factly.
"So I have no time for Jocelyn," I sighed.
"You have no free time?"
"Six hours on Saturday when I used to work. Otherwise, I have to take time from Melody."
"That was an interesting revelation about her just a few seconds ago. Especially with the fact you're dating Katy and Tasha."
"It's complicated," I sighed. "If I could mix Angie and Melody into one person, I'd have the person I needed for the rest of my life."
"I believe you know it doesn't work that way."
"I do."
"I'll ask a question which I believe is impossible to answer -- if you had to pick just one girl to live the rest of your life with, who would she be?"
"I have no idea. And that's why I'm dating Katy and seeing Tasha when I'm home."
"Is Melody your girlfriend?"
"She thinks she is."
"But you don't?"
"We're not exclusive, so I'm not sure I should use that word."
"Then what do you call her?"
"I usually call her Melody," I replied with a grin.
"Smart aleck! What do you tell other people?"
"That we're dating, but not exclusive. She knows I see Katy and Tasha. She's not worried. She's also not worried about Angie."
"She's either seriously overconfident, or you haven't been honest with her."
"I have been totally honest!" I protested. "Melody is the one who pushed me to sort out my relationship with Jocelyn."
"And have you done that? With finality?"
"And here I thought this was going to be a nice, relaxing, drama-free Summer."
"I almost hate to say this, but you've made your bed..." Mom said with a semi-smirk.
"Now who's the smart aleck?" I asked. "And I STILL have no idea what to do."
"I suggest you start talking. To everyone."
"Wonderful," I sighed.
"What plans did you have for tonight?"
"None, actually. Jocelyn has something to do, and Dale isn't coming to West Monroe this Summer. I was just going to hang out at home. Why?"
"Dad and I are going out. Mindy is coming over to hang out with Liz."
"Then I think I'll stay in my room and read while I listen to music."
"Would you cook dinner for the girls?"
"I suppose I can do that," I said. "What ingredients do you have?"
"We're still in the Paschal feast, so you can make chicken; there are fresh chicken breasts in the fridge. We also have corn on the cob and salad."
"OK. I'm going to set up my stereo, then read for a bit. I'll start dinner after that. Where are you and Dad going?"
"To dinner and a movie. We're going to see Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid."
I left the kitchen and went to my room. I set up the stereo and then put away the rest of the things I'd brought home from school. I put on Combat Rock by The Clash and pulled out a book to read. I flipped the album when Side A finished, and after Side B finished with Death is a Star, I went back downstairs to start making dinner. While I was making dinner, Mindy arrived, and she and Liz immediately went to the basement. When I had everything ready, I called them to the table.
"This is REALLY good!" Mindy declared about halfway through the meal.
"Thanks."
"When did you learn to cook?"
"My mom has been teaching me for a few years, and I enjoy cooking, though I'm far from an expert, and it's not something I'd want to do all the time."
"Not interested in being a 'house husband'?" Mindy teased.
"No way!" I replied.
"Well, they do say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. I think it works the other way, too!"
"Yuck!" Liz said, making a gagging sound.
"Just for that, YOU can do the dishes!" I said in mock outrage.
"I was going to do them anyway!" Liz replied.
When we finished, we had some ice cream that I'd found in the freezer, and then I went back to my room to listen to music while Liz and Mindy did the dishes. I put on Marshall Crenshaw's studio album of the same name. It had been recommended by the guy at the record store in McKinley, and, as usual, his recommendation had been spot on. I picked up my book but then put it down a few minutes later because the issues I'd talked with Mom about earlier were swirling around my mind.
My priority HAD to be the new study group that Clarissa had organized. I simply could not take my eyes off my ultimate goal. I felt I needed to continue to go to church, do my daily prayers, practice karate, and run in the mornings. That meant time with Melody, and Katy had to yield to Jocelyn. How that would happen, I had no idea, but I honestly didn't need to decide until the end of August. For the Summer, I could just do what I had planned -- work, karate, hang out with Jocelyn, see Katy, and visit both Angie and Melody.
I pushed the thoughts from my mind and picked up my book. I read through both sides of Marshall Crenshaw and John Cougar's American Fool. It had just finished when Mindy appeared in the open doorway.
"Do you like Jack and Diane?" she asked.
"Sure! And Hurts So Good. Both have been on the radio pretty often. The other songs on the album are good, too."
"What are you doing?"
"Just hanging out. Where's my sister?"
"Making popcorn. Do you want some?"
"Sure," I said, getting up from the bed where I'd been reading.
I followed Mindy down to the kitchen, where Liz was heating the 'Jiffy Pop' popcorn on the stove. I strongly preferred popping my popcorn in a large, covered skillet, but Liz preferred the 'lazy' solution. When the popcorn was ready, she tore open the foil and set the popcorn on the table. She got three Cokes from the fridge, and we sat down to have our snack.
"Do you have any Jimmy Buffett?" Mindy asked.
"Sure. I have Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes and A White Sport Coat and a Pink Crustacean."
Mindy giggled, then sang, slightly off-key, "Why don't we get drunk and screw..."
"Ugh!" Liz spat. "Not you, too!"
"What?" Mindy asked. "I was just being goofy! My dad listens to Jimmy Buffett all the time. He's been to a couple of his concerts and has all of his albums. It's a funny song!"
I decided that I would play along because it annoyed Liz, and I hadn't had much of a chance to do that since I'd left for school.
"That's too bad," I said.
"What? That my dad has all his albums?"
"No," I said soberly, "that you were just being goofy. I thought it sounded like a great idea!"
"Cut it out, Mikey!" Liz insisted.
"Or what?" I smirked. "And besides, YOU teased ME about Mindy back in April! In fact, you even suggested I offer!"
"SHUT UP!" Liz growled.
I grabbed a handful of popcorn and my bottle of Coke, and went back to my room. Liz was sufficiently annoyed, but I didn't want to push it TOO far. I put on The Beatles' Yellow Submarine and sat down on the floor, leaning against the bed. I finished my popcorn and Coke, then pulled out my book to read. About an hour later, Liz came to the door of my room.
"Why do you have to be such a jerk?" she asked, sounding very annoyed.
"Oh, come on, Liz. I was just being silly. And so was Mindy."
"Bull! You're going to screw another one of my friends, aren't you?"
"Nothing is going to happen between Mindy and me. Period. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to get some sleep."
"Famous last words," she muttered, turning to go to her own room.
May 29, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
"Thanks for taking me to breakfast!" Jocelyn said as we sat down at IHOP in Rutherford.
"You're welcome," I replied.
"What's the plan for today?" she asked.
"I really didn't have one," I said. "The only real plan I had was going to Vespers tonight."
"Lunch at my house? And then dinner at Ponderosa after church?"
I could do that without causing any problems because Tasha and her family were away for the weekend.
"Sure!"
We ate our breakfast and then headed back to West Monroe. At Jocelyn's house, she made a pot of coffee and put on some music, and then we sat on the couch.
"What did you and Melody decide to do about the Summer?"
Did I want to bare everything to Jocelyn now? Or did I want to wait until August? I didn't want to upset her and have her worry all Summer, which meant keeping the status quo, at least until later in the Summer.
"We'll talk on the phone, and I'll try to go see her in Youngstown. I'm planning to go see Angie in Cincinnati over Fourth of July."
"Are you still planning on seeing Katy every couple of weeks?"
"That's the plan," I said. "They have a family vacation to Europe in July for two weeks, but otherwise, I'll probably go up and see her every other Friday."
"What are your hours at the hardware store?"
"7:00am to 3:30pm, with thirty minutes for lunch. That lets me make it to karate at 4:00pm three days a week, so by 5:30pm, I'm free for the evening. With Dale in Wisconsin, I guess it's a duo instead of a trio for the Summer."
"It sucks, doesn't it?" Jocelyn sighed.
"Totally. Even though we had over a year to prepare for it, it's just not the same without him here; no offense."
Jocelyn smiled, "None taken. You and I are special together, but Dale was the perfect addition. As I said last Summer, I didn't realize how important it was that we be together. And I'm not just talking about our failed love affair."
"Failed?"
"What would you call it?"
"I don't know," I sighed. "I just don't want to think about anything between you and me that I would call 'failed'. Do you think things are different now between us? And are they better or worse?"
Jocelyn cocked her head to the side, "Different? Yes. Better? In most ways, I suppose. And on the plus side, neither of us are virgins!"
I chuckled, "And it was FAR more meaningful than Dale's fling with that girl in Madison. But I always thought you felt that Dale and I were far too focused on losing our virginity."
"You WERE!" Jocelyn laughed. "You'd have gone with any girl who offered!"
I shook my head, "No, I wouldn't have. You know that. April? Carol? No."
Jocelyn smiled, "I was waiting for the right man to come along. He did. And, truthfully, you and Dale were different. He was what I said; you, on the other hand, were waiting for the right girl."
"I suppose that's true. I haven't exactly been a monk since, though."
"I wouldn't have expected you to be a monk, at least once you got past your mental block."
"And you?" I asked.
Jocelyn smirked, "I'll take you upstairs right now if you want!"
"So 'failed' isn't the correct term after all?" I grinned.
"Not in THAT regard! But Melody more or less put an end to that, didn't she?"
"I suppose so," I sighed.
"What's bugging you, Mik? I can tell something is."
I nodded, "I'm trying to figure out how to balance things in August."
"You're afraid I'll come between you and Melody?"
I shook my head, "At first, but now I'm pretty sure the fear is that Melody and Angie will come between us."
"But not Katy or Tasha?"
"I see Katy once a week and Tasha only when I'm home, and that's limited by her dad."
"I don't think Angie will be a problem, not at least from everything you've said about her. You know I'll go to church with you if you ask, and I don't think she'd object. You two are very close spiritual friends, but that's it, right?"
I nodded, "Yes. Very much so. At first, I thought we'd end up as a couple, but that's not something she can contemplate at this point. We're the closest of friends, well, except you and me."
"She's filled in for me, at least somewhat, I guess?"
"I guess, but nobody can replace you. I suppose my real concern is having enough time for you and me. Our new study group is for pre-med, though a couple of our friends who are majoring in biochem are going to join us. Not hardly something that fits your pre-law curriculum."
"Maybe I'll have some classes with Melody; she's pre-law, right?"
"Yes. She's majoring in political science, the same as you are. But I'm not sure..."
"You don't want your girlfriend and your best friend to be friends?"
"Is it that simple?" I asked.
"Why not? You, Dale, and I did just fine."
"But you weren't sleeping with Dale!" I objected.
"No, but would you and I sleeping together have changed things with Dale?"
"I think it might have," I said. "Us as a couple and Dale with a girlfriend would have changed the dynamic."
She cocked her head and smirked, "Then I'd have had to sleep with him, too, to keep the trio a trio?"
Jocelyn couldn't keep a straight face, and we both broke up laughing.
"I do love him dearly," she managed to say through her laughter, "but not THAT much."
I just nodded.
"Certainly not to drive a wedge between us like that," she said softly.
"But you'd consider it otherwise?" I asked.
Jocelyn shook her head, "Dale? No chance. He is NOT my type. I'd have been a notch in his belt, nothing more. With you? It was something altogether different."
"Was?" I asked.
"Don't toy with me, Mik," Jocelyn warned. "Melody won't accept THAT, and you aren't going to give up on Melody, are you?"
"I'm not sure," I sighed. "It's, well..."
"Complicated?" Jocelyn asked.
"Yes."
"At this point in your life, that's pretty much what I'd expect."
"Jos, I love you with every fibre of my being, and I'll never, ever let anyone come between us."
"Your wife will," Jocelyn said. "She HAS to."
"A fair point," I said. "The problem is, at least as I see it, Melody will see you as a threat."
"Because you love me."
"Yes. I suppose she's going to have to get used to us spending time together. I just have to figure out when that's going to be."
"Because you're so busy with class, studying, and karate?"
There was no point in denying it now, only to raise it later. The conversation hadn't gone anything like I'd expected it to, but it didn't seem to have caused any issues between Jocelyn and me.
"Yes," I agreed. "We'll work it out. It's just a new dynamic."
"Jos and Mik, the Dynamic Duo!" Jocelyn replied contentedly.
May 31, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
"Thank you for agreeing to work on the holiday, Mikhail Petrovich!" Mr. Orlov said on Monday morning. "It's the best day to do a complete inventory."
"You're welcome. Where do you want me to start?"
"Work with Amelia on the power tools. One of you work the floor, the other the stock room."
"Amelia?" I asked.
"A young woman from a new family in our church. They were Roman Catholic but chose to be received into the Church. She'll be here any moment now."
"OK. I'll get right on it. I'll start in the stock room."
I picked up a clipboard and an inventory sheet, then headed to the stock room. About five minutes later, a girl who looked to be around my age came in and introduced herself as Amelia Riley.
"I just finished my Junior year at Ohio State," she said. "I'm a physics major."
"I just finished my Freshman year at Taft. I'm a biochemistry major planning to go to medical school."
"I don't remember you from High School. You went to Harding High, right?"
"Yes. But you were two years ahead, so I'm not surprised. I wasn't involved in much of anything except the chess club."
"Marching band. I played euphonium. Anyway, I guess we're doing inventory."
"Yep. I'll start in here. If you count the items on the shelves and the floor, then we'll add everything up and compare it with the count. Once we're done, I'm sure Mr. Orlov has more for us to do."
"I bet!" she laughed.
She left, and I began counting the power tools. When we finished, we added up the totals and compared them to the list Mr. Orlov had and found several discrepancies. We noted them, then moved on to begin counting the gardening items, which included hand tools, fertilizer, grass seed, flower seeds, and a number of other items. That took us until lunch, which Mrs. Orlova provided.
"What are you going to do with your degree in physics?" I asked as we ate sandwiches in the break room.
"Get a Masters and a PhD and do research. I hope to work for NASA or one of the labs doing high-energy physics research. Do you know what kind of medicine you want to practice?"
"Emergency medicine," I said.
"I take it that's a difficult specialty?"
"Somewhat. Surgery, especially cardiac and neuro, are probably more challenging in some ways, but emergency medicine is what I want to do."
"Sorry, I didn't mean to sound demeaning; I don't know much about medicine."
"I didn't take it that way," I replied with a smile. "I'm doing what I want to do, just as you are. I know some pre-med students who want the most challenging specialty, whatever it is. Others want something specific, such as pediatrics or internal medicine. But, in the end, only the National Match matters. You can make your preferences known, but there is no guarantee you'll get what you want. It's all about top grades, good reviews for your training in the last two years of medical school, and good interviews. How does it work for you?"
"The undergrad and Master's degrees are pretty straightforward. Getting into a PhD program requires finding a sponsor and then having my research approved and accepted. It can take years, especially in high-energy physics. Most likely, I'll end up someplace like the University of Chicago or Stanford. Where will you go to medical school?"
"I'm hoping to go to McKinley Medical School. Eventually, I hope to do my Residency at the affiliated hospital. I'd prefer Rutherford, but they don't have a teaching program."
"There's training after medical school?"
"For me, it'll be three years. If I were to do surgery, it would be seven or eight, depending. You are a doctor when you graduate medical school, but you're an Intern first, then a Resident. Eventually, you're an Attending Physician. Or, if you wish, after your Internship year, you can become a General Practitioner, what you know as a doctor you see for your physical."
"So they train in a hospital?"
"Everyone does. The rules vary by state. In Ohio, you have to do one year as an Intern and then one year as a Resident before you can get your license to practice independently."
"So, ten years? That's probably about how long it will take for my PhD."
We finished our lunch and then began our next assignment, finishing as planned at 3:30pm. The dōjō in Rutherford was closed because of the holiday, so I headed home.
June 4, 1982, Circleville, Ohio
"You're sure you're OK with having dinner with my parents?" Katy asked when she greeted me at the door on Friday evening.
"Yes, I'm sure. They leave us alone for the most part, so spending time with them occasionally isn't going to upset me."
"I think they're afraid we'll get into trouble," she smirked, "if you know what I mean!"
"I do!" I said, pulling her into my arms for another kiss.
"Dinner's almost ready," she said.
She led me to the great room, and we sat down for about five minutes before her mom called us to the dining room. Her parents greeted me, and we sat down to eat. As I'd expected would happen, I was peppered with questions about my first year of college, my future plans, my family, my friends, and just about every topic under the Sun. In some ways, it felt like an interview; in others, like an interrogation. It made me wonder if they knew, or suspected, that Katy had started taking birth control pills.
When we finished eating, Katy and I volunteered to do the dishes, both having the same idea that it would let us talk a bit privately.
"I suppose I'm prepared for my medical school interviews!" I chuckled as I washed a plate and put it in the rack.
"I'm really sorry," Katy replied. "I didn't realize they were going to give you the third degree! The only thing missing was the bright light in your eyes!"
"It did have that feel," I said. "Did something happen?"
"Nothing that I'm aware of."
"Do you think they know you're taking birth control pills?"
Katy shook her head, "I don't think so. I've been super careful, and they don't snoop in my room."
"Are they concerned about me? I mean, because I'm in college?"
"You're less than two years older than I am, and they didn't have a problem when I dated a Senior when I was a Sophomore. And it's not like you're a burnout or loser!"
"True!" I laughed. "It almost feels like Mrs. Sokolova said something to them about us being a 'match'."
"Mom and Dad don't believe in those stupid 'Old Country' traditions!"
"No, but Mrs. Sokolova does, just as Mrs. Orlova does at my home church. And you know what those «бабушки» (babushki) think! And what they say!"
Katy laughed, "I'm sure Mrs. Sokolov has us betrothed and ready for a crowning ceremony! But I'm still in High School! Mom and Dad are right about those 'Old Country' ideas."
"Things are a bit different here."
"You weren't planning on asking me to marry you, were you?" Katy asked with an arched eyebrow.
"Not at this time," I said with a grin.
"A VERY safe answer!" Katy laughed. "You don't commit to anything, and you don't upset me by saying 'no', which could be taken wrongly!"
We finished the dishes, then joined her parents in the great room. We played Rook, with Katy and me winning more than half the games. When it was time for me to head back to West Monroe, Katy walked me to my car as she usually did. I took her in my arms and held her.
"I'm sorry we didn't get to spend any time together alone," she said.
"It's OK, Katy. I'm not upset."
We exchanged a soft kiss.
"See you in two weeks?" she asked.
"Absolutely!"
We exchanged another soft kiss, then I got into my Mustang and headed back to West Monroe.
June 4, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
When I arrived home, Mom and Dad were sitting in the kitchen drinking lemonade, and I joined them.
"How was your date?" Mom asked.
"Katy and I spent the evening with her parents. During dinner, it seemed like I was having a complete background check for a 'Top Secret' security clearance!"
"I'd say they think you and Katy are getting serious, or, rather, Katy is very serious about you. They're sizing you up as a potential son-in-law."
"She's seventeen-and-a-half!" I protested. "And her parents aren't anything like Tasha's."
"They're parents, Mike," Dad laughed. "Parents of a teenage girl! You didn't deal much with April's dad, and Jocelyn's parents didn't see you as a suitor until you were eighteen, and they had known you for thirteen years."
"We're both WAY too young to consider anything like that," I said. "We're not even steady at this point!"
"No," Dad said, "but I suspect they believe that's going to happen and want to be sure you're suitable for Katy to date seriously."
"Have you talked to Jocelyn about the Fall?" Mom asked.
"Yes," I replied. "All we can do is see what we can work out. The potential problem will be Melody being worried about Jocelyn."
"If you and Jocelyn plan to be that close, then you're going to have to make sure your girlfriend is OK with it."
"I know. Jocelyn made a point about not coming between me and my wife when I eventually get married, but I don't want to lose my best friend!"
"It's going to be a struggle, Mike. Guys having girls as their best friends works right up until about High School, and then things start to become strained. April wasn't too worried because it was always you, Dale, and Jocelyn. Now it's just you and Jocelyn."
"Wonderful," I sighed. "I think I'm going to bed."
"Good night," both Mom and Dad said.
"Good night."
June 5, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
"Mishka!" Tasha squealed in delight when she greeted me in the narthex following Vespers on Saturday night.
"Hi, Tasha! Ready to go on our first official date?"
"Yes! Dad is OK with us going to see Star Trek."
"That was never in doubt," I chuckled. "But are YOU really OK with it?"
"Yes, of course! I told you it was OK. Science fiction is fine, so long as it's not a horror movie like Alien."
"I didn't go see that," I said. "It's not something I like, either. And I assumed your dad wouldn't be OK with Poltergeist because of the supernatural story."
"He would probably have to see it first, but I doubt he will. Star Trek is FINE, Mishka! And dinner?"
"How about Friendly's in Rutherford? It's close to the theatre."
"Sure!"
I walked over to Deacon Vasily to let him know what we were doing and promised to have Tasha home IMMEDIATELY after the movie, as he clearly emphasized with his tone of voice. I also promised to call immediately if I had car trouble or any other issue. Once he was satisfied, Tasha and I walked out, and I helped her into my car.
"He's an old fuddy-duddy!" Tasha groused.
"I wouldn't complain too much! He is letting us go out!"
"I'm surprised he isn't having someone tail us, you know, like in a spy movie!"
"What exactly does he think we're going to do?" I asked.
"You know very well what he thinks we're going to do!" Tasha giggled. "Because that is what we WANT to do!"
"Perhaps," I teased.
"Perhaps?" Tasha spat in outrage. "Perhaps? Mikhail Petrovich, if you want to take me home, then do so!"
"Relax, Tasha!" I chuckled. "I was teasing! But that's not going to happen tonight."
'Or anytime soon', I didn't add. Crossing that line with Tasha was an irrevocable decision, and I was in no position to do that. And she'd made me promise not to allow things to escalate that far, at least at this point. I had the same general concern about Katy, though, with her, it might not be a commitment at that level, though I had no doubt it would be a commitment to be exclusive.
"No, I suppose it won't," she sighed. "Someday..."
In the distant future!
"Let's focus on what's possible now," I said.
"Dinner, a movie, and very nice 'good night' kisses!"
"I think that sounds good!"
We enjoyed our meal at Friendly's, then drove about a mile down the street to the movie theatre to see Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan. We both enjoyed the movie, and I felt it was far better than Star Trek: The Motion Picture, which I'd seen with Dale and Jocelyn a few years earlier. When the movie finished, we left the theatre, Tasha stopped me as I opened her car door.
"I think I should give you your 'good night' kiss here!" Tasha said.
I took her in my arms, and she melted against me, and we exchanged a deep, sexy French kiss. Tasha didn't break the kiss and squeezed her arms tighter and tighter, mashing our bodies together. I had an involuntary reaction, which there was no way she could miss, given how tightly she was holding me. When she finally broke the kiss, Tasha was breathing hard, and I was too, but not just breathing! She didn't relax her arms but simply put her head on my shoulder.
"Did you like the kiss?" Tasha asked impishly.
"Very much so!"
"Good! I want another one! Then you can take me home before Dad calls out the National Guard!"
We exchanged another deep, sexy kiss, hugged for a moment afterwards, and then got into the car for the drive back to her house.
June 6, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
"Mike?!" Mom called up the stairs. "Telephone!"
I left my room and went down to the kitchen to take the call.
"Hello?" I said.
"Mike? It's Becky van Dorn!"
"Becky?! How are you?"
"Good. How did your semester go?"
"Straight A's for the year," I said. "How was the rest of your Senior year?"
"OK. I got all A's and B's, though it was a bit strange because of going to school in Ohio for a few months, but they worked it out. I told you I was accepted to Central Michigan, and I'll start in the Fall. I'm undeclared right now, but I'm thinking social work."
"Cool. How are your sister and brother?"
"Jake is doing fine. Abby is doing about as well as can be expected. She'll be moving here in a week or so."
"So what's up?" I asked.
"I was wondering if I could come visit?"
"I suppose," I said.
"If you don't want me to, I understand."
"No, that's not it. You just kind of caught me off guard."
"Do you have a steady girlfriend? Is that it?"
"No. I'm dating, and there is a girl I spend a lot of time with at school, but we're not steady."
"Angie?"
I chuckled, "No. A girl named Melody. When were you thinking of coming to Ohio?"
"In a couple of weeks, if it's OK. My grandmother would want to talk to your parents, but I told her how nice you were when everything happened and how much you helped me."
"We don't have a guest room, so we'll need to work that out, but I'd love to see you. How long would you stay?"
"A couple of days. Just to hang out and talk."
"I work weekdays from 7:00am to 3:30pm."
"Then a weekend is probably better, right?"
"Probably," I said.
"Let me talk to Grandma and call you in a couple of days. Are any weekends out?"
"Just Fourth of July. I'll be in Cincinnati visiting a friend."
"Melody?"
"No, she lives in Youngstown."
"OK. I'll talk to you in a couple of days!"
"Sounds good!"
We said 'goodbye' and hung up, and then I went to find Mom.
"That was Becky. She wants to come visit for a few days. She's going to figure out when, and then her grandma will call to talk to you to make sure it's OK. I can sleep on the sofa bed when she's here, and she can have my room so she has some privacy."
Mom smiled, "I don't believe that's how it worked out last time."
"Things are different now," I said. "I told her about Melody."
"Yes, but WHAT did you tell her about Melody?"
"Never mind," I said, shaking my head. "I'm going to get ready to go to the pool. Jocelyn and I are taking Liz and Mindy, and Emmy is meeting them there. Liz did clear that with you, right?"
"Yes. Keep an eye on her, Mike. Don't be overbearing. If she's talking to teenage boys, that's fine. If she's talking to adult men, you need to step in."
"Which will make me EVER so popular," I sighed. "But I'll do it."
"Thanks."
I went upstairs and put on my bathing suit and a T-shirt, grabbed a towel, and let Liz know I was ready to go. She came out of her room, we said 'goodbye' to our parents, then went out to my car. We picked up Jocelyn and Mindy, in that order, then headed for the public swimming pool in Rutherford, where Emmy was waiting at the gate. The three girls hugged and went off together while Jocelyn and I found a couple of chairs where we left our blankets and shirts and got into the pool.
"The scars don't show with this particular cut of suit," Jocelyn said, referring to her black, conservatively cut one-piece suit.
I shrugged, "They never bothered me, and, honestly, when I've seen you naked, I was looking at OTHER things!"
"Pig!" Jocelyn laughed.
"Says the woman who couldn't take her eyes off my erection when we were in Cincinnati!"
"That's different!"
"Double standard, Miss Mills?" I asked with an arched eyebrow.
"Maybe!" she laughed. "Don't look now, but your sister is flirting."
"High School guy? Or older?"
"I'd guess seventeen or eighteen."
"Mom's OK with that. If you see her talking to an older guy, then we have to intervene."
"What's up with Mindy? She was all doe-eyed when she got into the car."
"She flirted with me a bit the day I arrived home, and Liz has teased me about her. But my limit on High School girls is Katy and Tasha. And Tasha's a special exception because she just finished her Sophomore year."
"Is that Melody's doing? Or yours?"
"Me, mostly. A couple of people commented on it, and it is a bit of 'two different worlds', if you know what I mean. With Katy and Tasha, we have church in common, and Katy's less than two years younger. Tasha is about two-and-a-half."
"Emmy is still banned from your house?"
"Oh yeah! The minute we let 'those people' into our house, it was as if we had the plague or something. Like being black was contagious or something."
"Racism is just stupid. Well, any kind of discrimination is stupid."
"We both discriminate against stupidity and being a burnout."
"That's different," Jocelyn laughed. "It's OK to discriminate against those things!"
After about thirty minutes in the pool, we went to the deck chairs, put on suntan lotion, and relaxed in the June sun.
"What's the plan afterwards?" Jocelyn asked.
"I figured A&W," I said. "We can take the girls with us or take them home. I'm sure they'll want to go, and I'd rather not go all the way out of my way to take them back to West Monroe."
"That's a change from last year!"
"I know," I said. "I'm trying to be nicer to Liz, though I do give her grief."
"That's what brothers are for!" she laughed. "And best friends!"
"I'll give YOU something if you aren't careful!"
"Hmm," she smirked. "Seven inches long, hard, and VERY fun to play with?"
"I thought we agreed that was off-limits," I replied.
"You don't want that. I don't want that. MELODY wanted that. True?"
"That's basically true," I admitted with a small sigh.
"Then it's your move, Mik," she said.
II. Mik and Jos
June 6, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
"Jos," I sighed. "It's not that simple."
"Isn't it?"
"Come on! You know that would end things between Melody and me!"
"I believe Melody has been good for you, but is she THE ONE? Wait! Don't answer. If she was, you wouldn't be dating Tasha and Katy, and you wouldn't still be carrying a torch for Angie."
"Angie is just a friend," I protested.
Jocelyn smiled, "I'll take that wager anytime you want to make it. You can answer my first question now."
I sighed, "I have no idea. Isn't that the point of dating?"
"Yes, of course. But do you think she'll let us be as close as we've been? And if not, can she actually be THE ONE?"
"Hang on! Didn't you tell me that you couldn't come between my future wife and me?"
"That's true, but being a close friend doesn't mean coming between the two of you."
"You have me totally confused, Jos. What is it you want?"
"To be Mik and Jos. I know I can't be your wife because of the accident. I know you aren't looking for a 'brood mare' or anything of the sort, but having your own children has always been important to you. I knew that, and it's why I had such difficulty in telling you about the hysterectomy."
"And being 'Mik and Jos' means sleeping together? For how long? Our whole lives?"
"No, of course not. But you aren't exclusive with Melody, and she basically forced you to stop sleeping with me. Why?"
"She sees you as a threat."
"And she'll always see me as a threat."
"Are you jealous?" I asked.
"Not the way you mean," Jocelyn sighed. "But you have all new friends..."
"And you're afraid you're an afterthought?"
"I suppose that's the best way to put it," Jocelyn sighed.
In a sense, she was right. It was the very issue I'd talked about with my mom the day I'd arrived home from Taft. I'd put it in terms of time, but it really was about my true priorities. I hadn't really given enough thought to anything other than my primary goal. Melody had pushed me to do that, as had others, but really, in the end, I simply hadn't given them the thought I should have.
Worse, I'd assumed that Jocelyn and I would always be the way we had been and that it would just happen without serious effort because it had always happened without serious effort. It just 'was'. Now, it was going to be work -- hard work.
"May I be totally honest?" I asked.
"If not with me, then with whom?"
"True," I replied with a slight smile. "I was struggling with how to, if you'll excuse the phrase, fit you into my new life."
"I suspected as much. Your study group, it's led by a girl?"
"Yes, her name is Clarissa, but don't worry; she's no competition. Well, not for you. She is for me."
"Huh?"
"Privately, and please don't repeat this, she confessed to me she's lesbian."
Jocelyn laughed, "I get it. Competition for you, not for me. Or perhaps..."
I grinned, "Nice smirk, but I don't think that's your cup of tea!"
"It's not!"
"Though it might solve one problem!" I teased.
"Forget it!"
"Jos, it seems as if you're telling me to break up with Melody."
"No, I'm asking you if you REALLY think she's the one. In your heart?"
I sighed deeply, "Not if she's going to push us apart."
"It's going to take a very special kind of girl to accept our relationship, even after we both marry."
"And a special guy?" I asked.
"Yes."
"There's always Dale..." I smirked.
"No chance. And it's not like with you and me. I was never, ever attracted to Dale. And his view of women..."
"Has changed now that he finally got what he's been trying to get since we were fourteen. I talked to him a couple of weeks ago and he's really calmed down. He's focused on his studies, and he has a steady girlfriend. He also quit drinking."
"So he's grown up a bit; that's good. You have, too."
"I have a long way to go," I sighed. "What do I do about Melody?"
"You have to decide, Mik. Nobody can decide that for you. You have to decide if she's worth the changes and compromises that have to be made in any relationship and if those compromises are ones you can not only make but be happy with."
"Happy with?"
"If you make a compromise which makes you unhappy, you'll live to regret it. Didn't you tell me Melody is asking you to make significant concessions about church?"
"I don't think I said 'significant'," I said, trying to remember the conversation. "But with Katy, there is some of that, too."
"But not with Tasha. Or Angie."
"You keep coming back to Angie, and I've seen NO signs there."
Jocelyn smiled, "We'll see. So? About what we want?"
"I wouldn't feel right about it."
"Because of Melody. But you aren't exclusive with her."
"No, I'm not. But I did tell her we'd resolved things."
"Then, as I said, it's your move, Mik."
It was my move, and I truly hadn't anticipated Jocelyn giving me what amounted to an ultimatum. Actually, that wasn't true. It was Melody who had given the ultimatum, in effect, and I'd done what she'd wanted. Had I done the right thing? What WAS the right thing? What was my relationship with Jocelyn SUPPOSED to be? She wanted us to be lovers, at least for a time. Was that right? Was it somehow giving her false hope for the future, despite her clear statements that she didn't plan for nor expect that?
Fortunately, Jocelyn let the matter drop, and after a couple of hours, I let Liz know it was time to head to Rutherford to have dinner at A&W. We said 'goodbye' to Emmy, who had to head home, and then Jocelyn, Liz, Mindy, and I got into my Mustang for the drive to Rutherford.
"Thanks for letting us come with you, Mikey," Liz said.
"Keep calling me 'Mikey', and I might change my mind!" I said lightly.
"Well I think it's cute!" Mindy declared.
"Miiinnnnddddyyyy!" Liz whined. "Stop!"
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jocelyn roll hers. She was thinking exactly the same thing I was -- Mindy was flirting and that annoyed Liz to no end. And despite Liz's belief to the contrary, nothing was going to happen between Mindy and me.
"Want some cheese to go with that whine?" I teased.
In the rearview mirror, I saw Liz cross her arms and glare at me. She kept the evil 'death stare' until we reached the A&W. Her face softened a bit, but I could tell she was still annoyed. We went inside, placed our orders, and when our food was ready, took it outside to one of the picnic benches to eat. When we finished, we tossed our trash in the nearby garbage can and got back into my car to drive back to West Monroe.
I dropped Mindy at her house, then took Jocelyn home, and finally, headed back to my house, where I went up to my room and put on The Game by Queen and lay on my bed to think about everything Jocelyn had said. I owed Melody a call per our agreement to speak once a week on Sundays, but I didn't want to call her until I thought more about what Jocelyn said. In the end, I called but avoided the topic as there was no point in creating problems where none might exist. I kept the conversation on what we'd been doing and what we planned to do.
June 10, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
"Mike," Mr. Orlov said, "John is sick, so I need you to mix paint and make keys today. Amelia will run the register."
"Will do," I said.
"Otherwise, just work the floor as you normally would."
"OK."
My morning was almost completely occupied with mixing paint and making keys. I didn't do those normally, but I had been trained. I was slower than John would have been, but fortunately, all the customers were patient while I followed the carefully written instructions for mixing paint and carefully moved the mechanism of the key machine, which passed the key along a guide, allowing a duplicate to be cut.
"How difficult is it to make keys?" Amelia asked at lunch.
"It's not tough; you just have to be careful in ensuring the key you're copying and the blank are properly situated in the vise and then carefully move the mechanism. John taught me how to do it in less than two hours. The only problem is if you're not accurate in putting the key and blank into the machine. Well, assuming we have the blanks, which we do for all the common keys."
"Can you make those old-fashioned keys?"
I shook my head, "We don't have any blanks and our machine can't cut them. We send people to Cincinnati or Columbus if they need those. I don't think I've seen one in the three years I've worked here. John only told me about them so I'd know what to do if someone showed up with one."
"Do you know how to pick a lock?"
I laughed, "I'm no criminal, and I'm not a locksmith. And no, I don't know how to hot-wire a car!"
"So what good are you?" Amelia teased.
"If you're planning a multi-state crime spree like Bonnie and Clyde, I'm not your guy!"
"Bummer!" she laughed. "So, what do you do for fun?"
"Not much, really. I'm so busy studying and going to class that I don't have much time for excitement. You?"
"Same, really. If I want to get into a top graduate program like Stanford or University of Chicago, I have to get straight A's."
"I know about Stanford, but the University of Chicago?"
"You don't know much about the Manhattan Project, do you?"
"Not really. I mean, I know they built the atomic bombs that were dropped on Japan and exploded the first one in New Mexico."
"Scientists at the University of Chicago built the first working 'atomic pile', the precursor to a proper nuclear reactor. It was built under the stands of the old football stadium. And the University is on the South Side of Chicago."
"No way! Under the football stadium? In the city?"
"They eventually decided that was a bad idea and moved it to the Argonne Forest outside Chicago, which is where Argonne National Laboratory is now."
"I think 'bad idea' is an understatement."
"True, though given that the war was going on, certain safety precautions were, well, fudged. They ran the reactor up to a couple of hundred watts once, which could have powered a light bulb if it was configured to create electricity, which it wasn't. They decided that continuing the experiments there was too dangerous to everyone around, so they never ran it up that high again. At that point, they decided to move it out of the City of Chicago to reduce the risks to the public."
"That's just crazy. Building something like that in the city limits? Wow! So is that what you're going to work on?"
"No. 'High-energy' physics studies sub-atomic particles, usually using a particle accelerator. There are two main ones in the US -- the SLAC at Stanford and the Tevatron at Fermilab outside Chicago."
"Is that the place you mentioned before?"
"They're about twenty miles apart, I think -- Argonne National Laboratory and Fermi National Accelerator Laboratory. Anyway, I don't think I can really explain what it's all about during a short lunch period; or a long one, for that matter. If you go to the library at Taft, you can find The Feynman Lectures on Physics, which are probably the single best introduction to college-level physics. The third book is the one you want, but read the other two first because it builds on stuff in the first two."
"I'm not sure I have time for something like that," I said. "My understanding of science at that level is pretty much limited to what I learned in High School plus watching Cosmos. I'm going to need to spend a ton of time learning medicine, and for the most part, physics isn't all that important."
"I suppose that makes sense. I'm not likely to pick up a medical textbook and read it for fun."
"And on that note, I think we need to get back to work!"
"We do. Talk to you at lunch tomorrow?"
"Sure," I agreed.
June 11, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
When I arrived home after karate on Friday afternoon, I found a note from Liz stating that Becky had called. I dialed the number on the note, and she answered on the second ring.
"Would it be OK if I visited the 25th through the 28th?" she asked after we greeted each other.
"I think that would be OK. There's nothing on the family calendar. My mom is OK with you staying with us. You can have my room, and I'll use the sofa bed in the basement."
"You don't have to do that. I could take the sofa bed. Or..."
I wasn't really surprised by the implied offer, but I wasn't sure it was a good idea, either. I decided to try a gentle deflection.
"I thought you were dating," I replied.
"I'm not steady, and you said you weren't, either."
"That's true; but Melody and I are fairly serious. Does not sleeping in the same bed change your plans?"
"No," she said. "I want to see you and your family."
"I'll let my mom know you'll be here on the 25th. I assume you're driving?"
"Yes. My grandmother helped me buy a car -- a blue 1977 Chevy Impala coupe. I'd arrive sometime late on Friday afternoon and go home on Monday morning if that's OK."
"I don't see any problems with that. It's probably a good idea that you call when you're leaving so we know when to expect you."
"OK. I'll talk to you before then, OK?"
"Sure."
We said 'goodbye', and I hung up and went upstairs to shower and dress for my dinner date with Jocelyn. I still hadn't come to any firm conclusions, and Jocelyn had been patient, but I could tell her patience was wearing thin. I understood her concerns, and I felt she had a reasonable fear that Melody would force the issue further because I was sure that Melody actually did see Jocelyn as a threat. And I certainly understood why, given how close Jocelyn and I were. The question I had to answer was whether or not I believed Melody could handle that closeness.
I finished dressing, wrote a note for Mom letting her know I was out with Jocelyn, and then walked out to my Mustang for the short drive to the Mills' house, where Jocelyn was waiting. I held the door open for her then quickly went around, got in myself, and we were quickly on our way to a Chinese restaurant in Rutherford.
"Jos, are you asking to start sleeping together again because you think it'll lead to us eventually getting married?"
"I wondered when you would ask that question directly, and the answer is 'no'. That's a compromise you can't make and still be happy."
"Then it's just sex?" I asked.
"No. It can never be 'just sex' between us."
"You need a boyfriend, Jos."
"Sure, but I figure the options are better at McKinley than here in West Monroe or Rutherford. There wasn't anyone we graduated with I was interested in, and then I was basically out of commission for six months. I'll be in McKinley most of the year for the next four years."
"And that will be someone who will allow us our close relationship?"
"I think it has to be."
"Which is why you're making the point about Melody," I said. "But I wonder if getting to know her would help."
"Possibly. You don't want to break up with her, do you?"
"I certainly don't want to break my word to her, which means you and I can't even consider sleeping together unless I do. Do you WANT me to break up with her?"
"I don't think that's a fair question," Jocelyn sighed. "Or maybe it's better to say I can't give you a fair answer. My answer would be selfish."
"We've always told each other the truth, Jos. Just say what you want."
She shook her head sadly, "Not always."
"That's in the past; forgiven and forgotten."
"You can't forget something like that!"
"But you can set it aside and not dwell on it; move past it. I suppose that's what I mean by 'forgotten'. We can't let it separate us!"
"The truth?"
"The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth," I said with a smile.
"Take me to dinner, then we'll go back to my house and fuck like bunny rabbits until dawn."
"And Melody?"
"I'm not giving you an ultimatum, Mik, just telling you like it is. If you want us to be 'Mik and Jos', you have to break up with Melody. She'll never allow it."
"Well, shit," I sighed.
"Did you just swear?" Jocelyn gasped. "In English? I don't think I've ever heard you do that. Ever!"
"There's a first time for everything, and I'd say this situation calls for it. What about my word to Melody?"
"What exactly did you tell her?"
"I don't want to play semantic games," I sighed. "I told her we'd resolved things and weren't 'playing house'."
"Did you promise not to sleep with me?"
"Somehow, I think 'sleeping' is the LAST thing on your mind!"
Jocelyn laughed, "Very true! I'm thinking about...well, do you want to hear it?"
I chuckled, "If not from you, then from whom?"
She smirked, "I want to suck that big dick of yours until you fill my mouth with hot, sticky cum, then I want you to lick my pussy until I cum, hard, then I want you to shove your big dick in my tight pussy and fuck me until I scream and you blast me full of cum! Then we sixty-nine until you can go again. Rinse and repeat!"
"Interesting," I said evenly.
"Interesting?!" Jocelyn shrieked. "Interesting?! I'll show YOU interesting! I'll tie you to my bed and whip your butt until it's red!"
I laughed, "I meant 'interesting' from the standpoint of I thought you'd want to make love, not..."
"Say the God-damned word, Mik!" she growled.
"Fuck."
"I do want to make love. After. Right now, I just need you to fuck me unconscious!"
"Somebody is horny," I teased.
"You have NO idea!"
"Should I be afraid?" I asked.
"Of whom? Of little ol' me?" she said with a fake pout and a whiney voice.
"Yes!" I replied.
"VERY!" Jocelyn said threateningly but then started laughing.
"I feel like I'm betraying Melody," I said.
"At the risk of repeating myself, you aren't steady with her, and she didn't tell you that anyone was 'off limits', did she?"
"No, but the implication of what I said to her was that we weren't sleeping together."
"We're not playing house, Mik. Maybe we were before; in fact, we probably were. But we aren't now. This is two best friends who want to have sex and are free to do so. We're both clear on the future."
"Orgasms? Lots of orgasms?"
Jocelyn laughed, "I like it when you are a bit risqué. It makes you more fun!"
"So you're saying I wasn't fun before?" I asked with an arched eyebrow.
"I said MORE fun, you dope!" she said, laughing. "But we didn't have THIS kind of fun before."
"We could have..."
"I thought the past was in the past!" Jocelyn protested.
"Yes, you're right. Sorry."
"Though we did miss out on four or five years of fucking each other silly..." Jocelyn sighed.
"And you're going to try to make up for it tonight?"
"I don't think you're going to regret it!"
"No, I'm sure I won't! I wonder, though, what you expect to happen in McKinley?"
"Why do you think I want to do this NOW? Because this is probably our last Summer, if you will, our last chance to do this before I start dating seriously. And before you decide to go steady with one of your Orthodox girls."
"How are you going to handle your situation?"
"Honestly and right up front," Jocelyn sighed. "I learned my lesson about that. If it's something a guy can't deal with, I want to know as soon as possible."
"That makes sense, though I probably wouldn't just blurt it out as soon as a guy asks you out!"
"Of course not! What kind of idiot do you think I am?"
"Well..." I smirked.
"Mr. Loucks, if you aren't careful, I'll penetrate YOU."
"Uh, no thanks. I don't even want to contemplate that in ANY way."
"Then behave!"
"Yes, Dear," I deadpanned.
Jocelyn rolled her eyes and shook her head.
"Why does this bother you so much?" she asked.
"Is it that obvious?"
"Yes."
"I suppose because it kind of feels like I'm cheating on Melody."
"Do you feel that way when you're kissing Tasha? Or when your tongue is in Katy?"
"Excuse me?" I protested in offense.
"Oh, give me a break! You provided all the clues I needed to know how far you and Katy had gone, and your 'outraged' face tells me I nailed it."
"You know me too well."
"Are you going to?"
"She hasn't decided if she wants to, and I obviously couldn't make a commitment if that's what she needed."
"I wouldn't want to be you if you had to tell Tasha you couldn't take her out on dates."
"Oh, I know. She's a heck of a lot more confident about us making ends meet while I'm in medical school than I am. Not to mention she's positive we're right for each other."
"But you aren't, obviously."
"Obviously. It's funny, my dream girl is available, and I'm the one who is on the fence."
"Everything changed when you went to McKinley and got away from West Monroe and Harding County High. Your horizons were broadened, and suddenly, you weren't feeling rejected by girls. In fact, you've been very successful, in a sense."
"I'm not sure I'd call what happened with Nancy 'successful'," I countered.
"Not every relationship works out. But if you think about it, you now see yourself as an attractive partner. I'm not talking about good-looking, though you are, but about seeing yourself as someone a young woman would want to be with. That's not how you felt in High School, is it?"
"No, it isn't. Well, except for April. Other than her, I was shot down regularly."
"And now you have girls falling over themselves to get your attention. You've had sex with several different girls. And you're pretty good at it, too!"
"Pretty good?" I gasped in mock outrage.
"Haven't you heard practice makes perfect?!"
I chuckled, "I get plenty of practice!"
"Not with me, you haven't! And you asked for MY judgment!"
"No, you offered an opinion! But in all seriousness, I see your point. A lot changed after we graduated."
"It was interesting watching Mindy flirt with you and watching Liz look like she was about to explode."
"That's because of the whole situation with Emmy; I have no intention of a repeat. My sister's friends are off-limits. It really isn't worth the hassle."
"It's different when you have options, isn't it?"
"It is. You know that Melody is going to blame you for me deciding she's not THE ONE."
"I think you might find things are different from what you expect."
"Why?"
"Call it women's intuition. But let's drop this topic, please. We're almost at the restaurant, and I want to eat, have a nice conversation, and then go back to my house and drown in orgasms."
"Sounds good to me!" I grinned as I pulled into the parking lot of the Chinese restaurant.
June 12, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
"Ready to get up?" I asked on Saturday morning.
"No!" Jocelyn sighed, snuggling close. "I want to stay in bed with you for the rest of the Summer."
"That will cost you about $2000 for this Summer and equal amounts in the future if I can't get a job."
"Hmm..."
"In your dreams, Miss Mills!" I chuckled. "Come on, we need to get up."
"How much grief are you going to get from your mom?" Jocelyn asked.
"From Mom? Not a lot. From Dad? Some. You know my mom; she's reasonably cool about me making my own choices. She even teased me about Becky's visit. I said we weren't going to share a bed, and she pointed out that wasn't what happened last time. And when I protested that I'd told Becky about Melody, she asked me, rhetorically, exactly what I'd told Becky about Melody."
"That you aren't steady. Which, in Becky's eyes, makes you 'fair game'."
"And in yours!"
"And other girls. See, if you were REALLY serious about Melody and REALLY thought she might be THE ONE, you wouldn't be seeing Katy or Tasha. That's how I knew it was safe to have you spend the night."
"Safe?"
"That I wasn't interfering; at least not really."
"So much for regular sex at school," I sighed theatrically.
"I thought that wasn't a priority!" Jocelyn teased as we disentangled our bodies and got out of bed.
"Believe me, I could go without if I had to, but I'd rather not."
"Told ya!" she laughed. "But I think you're wrong."
"Oh?"
"First of all, if you want Marie or Jeannette, they'll sleep with you in a heartbeat, at least from what you said. And I suspect if you tell Melody the truth, all of it, she'll keep sleeping with you. And if she won't, I will, discreetly, of course."
"We wouldn't be able to keep it a secret. Angie would figure it out right away because she's around so much. What makes you say that about Melody?"
"Well, first, you're good at it. Second, she wanted to sleep with you from the start. You were the one who put her off. She didn't expect you to be a monk over the Summer, and, unless I miss my guess, she was pretty sure we were going to fuck."
"Huh?"
"What did she want you to do?"
"Stop 'playing house'."
"In other words, quit pretending to be married or acting like we were married. Unmarried people fuck. It's a fact of life. What Melody was worried about was you deciding you COULD marry me. Has that happened?"
"No."
"Then I think you have your answer. I'll bet you anything you care to wager she doesn't give up."
"You're sure about that?"
"Positive."
"And you know this how?"
"First of all, I'm female, and so I know how women think. Second, I know how good you are. Third, she's tolerated you fooling around with Katy and Tasha."
"I do NOT fool around with Tasha. Kisses, yes, but anything more than that would commit me irrevocably to a course of action I'm not prepared to take."
"May I point out something that ought to be obvious, even to a guy as dense as you are?"
"I suppose."
"Girls have hormones, too. Last night should prove that, if nothing else. Tasha already told you she wants you in the worst possible way. I don't think her body will let her wait."
I sighed deeply as I put on a robe so we could walk across the hall to the bathroom to shower.
"I'm not as dense as you might think," I said.
"You knew?"
"She told me. In fact, she told me it was my job to make sure we didn't do anything we shouldn't."
Jocelyn laughed, "Talk about the fox guarding the henhouse!"
We went across the hall to the bathroom, and Jocelyn turned on the shower. When the temperature was right, we got into the combination shower/tub.
"Before you and I went to Cincinnati, I'd say she made a good decision," I said. "After Emmy, Becky, Nancy, and Melody, I'd say you're right."
"Does she know you've been having sex?" Jocelyn asked.
"Officially? No. But things she's said have made it clear that she suspects. The only thing she's clearly forbidden was finding a girl at college who would replace her, so to speak."
"Which is the REAL reason you aren't going steady with anyone. Because your fantasy girl won't permit it."
"It's a bit more nuanced than that," I said, taking the shampoo bottle from Jocelyn so I could wash her hair.
"Oh?"
"Before she was allowed to date, at least in the limited fashion that started when I came home, it was simply not getting engaged to anyone or making that kind of commitment. We haven't talked since her dad relented, and let us call our dates for what they are, though we do have a BIT more freedom."
"You do realize at some point you're going to have to make that decision, right?"
"The day she graduates from High School and moves to McKinley to be close to me."
Jocelyn sighed deeply as I massaged her scalp while lathering her hair.
"Probably a bit before that," she said, "because she'll start looking for a job or apply to Taft, depending on what her plans are. I mean, besides being Mrs. Michael Loucks, MD."
"Which gives me about eighteen months before I have to make a decision about her."
I helped Jocelyn rinse her hair, then began soaping her body.
"If you had to pick right now, who would you choose?"
"I don't know, really. Part of it depends on Melody's willingness to compromise on church."
"I think you know the answer to that, but just don't want to say it out loud."
"You think she's expecting me to move very close to her position?"
"It's not uncommon, is it? A lot of kids who go to church stop going when they go off to college and never return, or do so much later in life."
"But she sees me going regularly, saying my prayers, following the fasting rules, and so on."
"But she doesn't go with you, right?"
"Right," I agreed.
Jocelyn rinsed off the suds and then took the soap from me to lather my body.
"Which tells me that one of two things is likely true. The first is that she believes you'll change if she asks you to."
"And the second?" I asked when she paused.
"That she is enjoying having you as a boyfriend and sex partner but knows it won't work in the long run."
"That doesn't fit what she's said," I protested.
"Doesn't it? Didn't you tell me she said sexual compatibility was her primary criterion? And once that was out of the way, THEN she could work on a relationship. Where are her priorities?"
"Right up there with yours!" I teased. "Ow!"
Jocelyn had grabbed my testicles and squeezed just hard enough to cause a bit of pain.
"You were saying?" she laughed as she released me and finished soaping my body.
"That might not have been the wisest thing to say right at that moment, given where your hand was."
"You certainly didn't complain about my priorities last night!"
"Mike Loucks, sex toy!" I chuckled.
"In your DREAMS!" she laughed. "Rinse off."
I did, and then we got out of the shower. After drying off, we put on our robes and went back to her room to dress and then went downstairs to make breakfast.
When we walked into the kitchen, her mom said 'good morning' but frowned, and I got a glare from her dad. While I wasn't going to get much grief at home, it appeared that Jocelyn would. I simply answered with a friendly 'good morning', then helped Jocelyn make sausage, eggs, and toast for us. We sat down to eat just as her parents left the kitchen.
"They aren't happy," I said quietly.
"I'm an adult and make my own decisions," she said. "They don't like it, but I pretty much told them to mind their own business."
"Aren't they paying for college?"
"Sure, but they won't cut me off because of you. They didn't have a real problem with us having sex when they thought we were on the path to getting married. It's, well, recreational sex that bothers them."
I laughed hard, but fortunately, I'd just swallowed my sip of orange juice just before she'd said that.
"Recreational sex? Really?"
"What else would you call it? It's not casual in any sense of the word, and while we love each other, it's not romantic. So to them, it's just screwing because we enjoy it. That offends them."
"My dad, too," I said. "But he was raised in a fundamentalist Evangelical church, so I understand it."
"My parents are typical, conservative Missouri Synod Lutherans. You've been to my church, and it's not orders of magnitude different from yours in that we have a priest wearing vestments, candles, a liturgy, and so on. Heck, we even have icons in our church! Think about Tasha's parents and dial them back a notch. That's pretty typical for our church. Dating isn't a problem, but pre-marital sex sure is. My parents kind of ignored the issue because of what I said before about them thinking we would be getting married."
"The «бабушки» (babushki) are of the same mind. As they see it, once you're 'betrothed', it's more or less OK to have sex because you're committed to getting married. It's not something they'd admit to unless pressed, but it's true. Remember what I said about them wanting to arrange marriages?"
"Yes," Jocelyn smirked. "They know teenagers are horny and want to fuck like bunnies, and their solution is what they're trying to do with you and Tasha or you and Katy."
"Exactly."
"And your problem, very soon, is going to be the fact that Tasha knows that."
I nodded, "That thought had crossed my mind."
"Don't do it."
"I'm not THAT stupid," I declared firmly.
"Men don't always think clearly when sex is involved, especially when we're talking about a girl you've described as 'smoking hot' and who has been the object of your desire for at least four years. Not to mention, she clearly wants you, and I suspect she'll be super-exciting in bed."
"How would you know THAT?" I asked.
"Call it a vibe or intuition."
"And you think it's a good idea to say THAT when you know I'm already struggling with the whole topic?"
"What are friends for?" Jocelyn said impishly.
"Thanks," I said, ruefully shaking my head.
I knew she was right, though. On our first official date, Tasha had made it clear by how she'd hugged me and by the fact that she hadn't shied away from my erection. In the past, she'd made it clear that she wanted to make love with me when the time was right, and I suspected that Tasha's view of the 'right' time had shifted, perhaps by several years and by at least one important event -- engagement, if not marriage.
The situation with Katy wasn't all that different. It was just a question of how close to crossing the line we came. And we'd come VERY close, to the point where we'd almost done it 'accidentally'. Well, without forethought was probably a better way to put it. And the next Friday, there was a good chance we'd be alone. Katy had been on the Pill, 'just in case', for long enough that we could safely have sex. And I wondered if that was her intent.
We finished breakfast and cleaned up, and Jocelyn walked me out to my Mustang.
"See you tomorrow after church?" she asked.
"Yes."
We hugged and kissed, and I got into my car to head home. When I arrived, I went upstairs and changed into shorts and a T-shirt and then went to the basement to my dad's workshop.
"Decided to simply get it over with?" Dad asked.
"I knew you'd have something to say, so I came to hear it."
"You're an adult, Mike. You make your own decisions, for better or worse. But I'm still your dad, and that means I'm supposed to help you make the right ones."
"And you think staying with Jocelyn last night was the wrong decision?"
"I don't know. Forty-five has a way of forgetting what nineteen is like. The only question I have for you is whether or not you're being honest with her."
I chuckled, "The chances of me not being honest with Jocelyn are pretty much zero. She knows what I'm thinking before I say it!"
"Yeah, well, that's true of wives for sure. I always thought it was the diamond ring. You know, some kind of focusing crystal for male thoughts!"
"I didn't know you were a closet Hippie!"
"It does sound that way, doesn't it?" he laughed. "But you'll find it to be true. Women almost always know what we're thinking. Sometimes, before we even think it!"
"You're scaring me!" I laughed. "It's bad enough she can read my thoughts, but if she knows them before I do, I'm in REAL trouble."
"Congratulations, Mike. Now you know what being a husband is all about!"
"Wonderful," I sighed, but I was laughing as well.
III. Jocelyn's Solution
June 12, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio
"What's going on between you and Jocelyn?" Mom asked when I returned upstairs after talking to Dad.
"I thought that was obvious," I smirked. "Or did you want details?"
"Pass," Mom laughed. "But seriously, Mike, what's going on?"
"We love each other. We had a long, long talk about everything, and this is what we want to do. We're not going to marry; we both understand that. And I'm not going steady with Melody."
"Do you love Melody?"
I shrugged, "I have no idea how to even answer that question. I suppose it depends on how you mean it."
"You've been listening to Father Herman's homilies and in Sunday School," Mom smiled. "With Jocelyn, you'd die for her. With Melody, well, I suppose it's a combination of lust and friendship."
"Probably."
"Are you IN love with anyone?"
"You mean romantically? As in want to spend my life with? Have children with? No. But didn't Father Herman make the point that being 'in love' isn't enough?"
"It's not. The hard work of keeping a relationship healthy comes from something deeper. Something you have with Jocelyn, I'll point out."
"But that's not enough, either," I said. "There's much more to it."
"If you understand THAT, then believe it or not, you're ready whenever the time comes."
"Ready? To marry?"
Mom nodded, "Practical concerns will always be there, but if you understand the basic structure of the relationship and how difficult it is to make a happy, loving home, then yes, you're ready."
"The only real practical consideration at this point is finances. Both Taft and McKinley Medical School have efficiency apartments for married couples in their dorms, and renting a studio apartment in McKinley isn't much more expensive than living in the dorms."